Just Like Any Kid Your Age
by PkPkC
Summary: Pre-series. Saturdays in the McFadden household are never boring. Between one brother opting out of a family tradition, over a dozen eggs going missing from the kitchen, and a shocking phone call from town, the day before Halloween is full of surprises. Warning: this story will contain spanking/corporal punishment of a minor by an older brother/parental figure.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

It was Adam's Saturday to make lunch. Brian was a better cook, everyone knew it, but Adam had promised his brother he would prepare the meals two weekends a month. In the four years since their parents passed away, Adam had mostly been able to keep that promise, and today was no different. Brian had driven some of the boys to town for football practice, leaving Adam with only Crane and Guthrie to help him out. While Adam worked at spreading butter and mustard on bread for sandwiches, Crane stood at the sink, washing the last of the breakfast dishes and watching through the window as six-year-old Guthrie struggled to climb a tree in their large farm yard.

"I appreciate you staying back to help me," Adam told his fifteen-year-old brother, playfully brushing his hand through Crane's strawberry blond waves. "You know you could have gone to town with Brian and the boys."

"I know," Crane said, his only reply distant, as though lost in some faraway thought.

The problem, Adam noted, was that Crane always seemed to have something heavy on his mind, and no one could ever guess what it was. Adam had a good idea why Crane wanted to stay home, though he would never say it out loud to the boy. Just a couple months shy of sixteen, Crane was obviously desperate to grow up, and lately he seemed to be embarrassed around his little brothers. Adam knew the feeling. Being the oldest of seven boys, there had been hundreds of times in his life that Adam wanted to crawl into a hole and die when one of the little guys said something embarrassing or caused a scene in public. He didn't blame Crane for feeling this way, though Adam no longer had the luxury of wanting to avoid the kids. Not since his parents were killed and left him and Brian responsible for a bunch of baby brothers and the farm.

"Hey, Adam?" Crane still looked out the window as he spoke in that quiet, distant voice of his. "I'm going to ask you something, but I don't want you to get mad." He let the words hang like a question, and Adam almost laughed.

"When do I ever get mad at you?" As far as Adam was concerned, Crane was just a half turn away from perfect, with his excellent grades and trouble free life. But he didn't want the kid to think he was making fun of him, so he feigned seriousness for a moment. "I'll only get mad if you give me a good reason."

There was a slump in Crane's shoulders then, but Adam thought it might be because of relief. Although the third oldest, Crane was still almost five years younger than Brian but still too old to be lumped in with the little boys. Sometimes Adam noticed that Crane seemed to long for attention, just like the younger ones, but he never asked for it the way the younger ones did, and never seemed to understand that his older brothers were there to look out for him too.

"I don't want to take the boys trick or treating tomorrow," Crane said, his words quiet and fast. "I know we always go together, but I'm too old for Halloween and I don't feel like walking up to every door in town on a-"

Crane clammed up quick when he felt Adam's hand grip his shoulder, and he was surprised to hear his oldest brother say, "Okay."

A quick breath from Crane as he glanced at Adam. " _Okay?_ You won't make me go?"

"Of course not." Adam was almost hurt that his brother thought he would get upset about this. "In case you forgot, Brian and I quit trick or treating years ago. We only picked it up again when – well, you know, so the boys would have someone to take them."

Crane only managed to nod his head in understanding before turning back to the sink. He had expected a fight, or at least some resistance from Adam, but not this. He felt almost disappointed in himself for thinking that his brother would get upset over something so small.

In a way Adam was disappointed too, because it meant Crane was growing older, and growing apart from the others. Part of Adam longed for the day that he no longer had to worry every waking moment about his little brothers, but another part of him knew he would be crushed when his youngest brother Guthrie decided he was through with childish traditions.

Having let the silence in the room carry on too long, Adam knew he had to change the subject to lighten the mood.

"Hey," he said, pulling open one of the cupboard doors in front of him. "Which would you prefer? Chocolate cake or brownies? Brian picked up a couple mixes last week."

Crane laughed. "What's the occasion?"

"It's Saturday, it's cold outside, and I feel like making something sweet. Now, are you going to tell me which one you want, or should I pick for you?"

"Brownies," Crane decided quickly. "We haven't had those in a while."

"Then brownies it is."

As soon as the ham sandwiches were piled high on a plate, ready for the rest of the family's arrival home, Adam pulled out a mixing bowl and tore into the box of brownie mix.

"Pass me a few eggs, would you Crane? I need four."

Putting the last of the clean dishes away, Crane scanned the counter before admitting that he couldn't find the eggs anywhere.

"What do you mean?" Adam asked. "We didn't have any for breakfast, and we didn't use any yesterday. We should have a bowlful at least."

Adam gently pushed passed Crane to see for himself. While he did find the egg bowl at the end of the counter, he noticed it was completely empty. "That's the second Saturday this month that Evan's forgotten to bring in the eggs. So much for making a treat."

Crane, wanting to make peace before any trouble broke out for his younger brother, offered to go out and gather the eggs right away. "I'll take Guthrie with me. You and Brian keep saying he's getting old enough to take on a few chores of his own."

"Yeah, but this is Evan's chore." Before Adam had a chance to give any other argument though, Crane slipped out the door and left the oldest brother standing in the middle of the kitchen alone. Adam would not have minded much if Evan had forgotten to do his chores, but before he left for football practice Adam specifically asked him if he'd finished all his work. Part of the deal with letting his brothers play sports on Saturdays was that they had to tend to their responsibilities at home first. Normally Evan was good about this rule. He cared too much for the animals to watch them suffer. But sometimes he was forgetful, and Adam hated to have to remind him again.

Knowing the others would be home soon, Adam planned to set out the lunch plates then head outside to wait for his brothers' return. Sometimes he wished they could all go into town to watch the boys' practice together, but there was too much to do around the ranch lately to spare both he and Brian.

Daniel and Evan were the only ones who played football. Adam and Brian had played in high school, but basketball had been more their sport. Crane wasn't a big athlete, although he did run track this year in the hopes that it would help land him a college scholarship in a couple year's time. Although Daniel was only twelve, and Evan a year younger than him, Murphys had a pee-wee football league that was mostly about training players so they would be seasoned by the time they started high school.

Adam wanted them on the team for a few reasons. One, it was a great way for both boys to burn off energy and frustration in a place other than the farm yard. Two, it was a chance for them to learn teamwork and respect for the coach. Adam thought it was important for the kids to learn to take instructions from people outside the family, especially Daniel, who had a habit of running to his brothers every time he didn't like what one of the other adults in his life had to say. So far, the team had been great for both boys, but it meant one of the older brothers had to drive them into town each week. Adam looked forward to the day Crane had his driver's license and could officially drive off the farm property.

Ford, who was ten, could hold his own around his brothers and liked to watch football practice, though he had no desire to join in the rough games. He did like to sit and watch with Brian though, and in a way, it was his chance to get individual attention from one of his surrogate parents.

Just as Adam began making his way to the front door to head back outside for chores, he was bombarded by the sound of stomping on the front steps. The front door flew open a moment later as Brian led their younger brothers inside.

"All right," he said over his shoulder, his voice loud to Adam's ears. "Dan'l, Evan, I want you to go wash up before lunch. Ford, you can-"

Adam cut Brian off before he had a chance to finish the instruction, catching Evan by the arm as he passed him on his way toward the stairs. "Don't go too far before lunch, mister. I want to talk to you about your chores before we eat."

"But-" Evan tried to protest, only to drop the subject as Adam released his grip.

"Lunch is ready," Adam said, turning back to Brian as Evan followed Daniel upstairs. "I guess chores can wait until later now that you guys are home."

"Just give me a few minutes," Brian begged, hoping the others had not heard Adam's statement. "Crane said he would help me fix the busted handle on the truck door and I want to get it done before anything else gets in the way."

"He means before he forgets again," Crane teased from the top of the porch steps. "Not sure how I can help."

Brian only shook his head. "You laugh now, but you're the one who's going to be driving that scrapper around. I'll teach you how to fix it now in case it breaks down on you later. I just have to get the tools from the back porch. Ford, you and Guthrie can go help Crane roll down all the truck windows, all right?"

Ford nodded, happy to be included, but Guthrie hung back in the entrance. "Do I have to go with Crane again? I'm bored of working with him."

Though Crane pretended not to hear Guthrie's remark, both Adam and Brian noticed the way the teen's cheeks flushed pink. As Adam opened his mouth to chastise Guthrie though, the phone rang, so Brian motioned for him to go answer.

"You go ahead with Crane," Brian told Ford. "I'll keep Guthrie with me."

While Adam took off to answer the phone, Ford and Crane slipped outside together. Once the others were gone, it seemed as though Guthrie couldn't help but feel as though he'd done something wrong. Brian crouched down before him, flashing him a horrible look of disappointment.

Guthrie looked to the floor nervously and began to fiddle with his thumbs. "Am I in trouble?"

"No, but I want to talk to you about what you just said."

"What did I say?"

"You said you're bored of working with Crane," Brian said, taking hold of his brother's hands so he would stop fidgeting and look at him instead. "I know you didn't mean it, but that was an unkind thing to say."

"Why? I've been working with Crane all day."

"How would you like it if I said I didn't want to play with you because I would rather play with Ford instead?"

"Not very good."

"I bet that's how Crane feels right now." Brian noticed the way Guthrie's lower lip began to quiver. "It's all right, you didn't mean anything by it and now you know not to say it next time. Why don't you go apologize to Crane? You'll see that he's okay."

Guthrie nodded, and wiped at the tears that had yet to fall from his eyes, before he turned on his heel and bolted out the door. Brian wished his other brothers were that easy to reason with, but it seemed the older they got, the more they liked to argue. His only hope was that as the youngest, Guthrie would stay a little less complicated than the others for a long time yet.

Brian didn't even make it back through the house with his tools before Adam got off the phone, and he was surprised when Adam told him that he had to make a trip into town.

"Look, it's nothing to worry about, there's just something I need to check on. Have lunch with the boys, and you can fix the truck when I get back, okay?"

"Well sure, but who was on the phone?"

"I'll explain when I get home," Adam said, and he was out the side door before Brian could question him further. When he reached the truck, he told the three boys to go in and eat.

"There weren't any eggs in the coop when Guthrie and I checked," Crane said, hopping out to the ground. "Maybe something got into the henhouse and spooked the chickens."

"Something got in all right," Adam muttered, pulling the keys from his brother's hand. "Don't worry about it."

"Where are you going?" Ford asked, remaining in the truck. "Can I come with you?"

"Not this time. You guys go in and have lunch. I'll be back soon." Without giving a formal goodbye, Adam pulled Ford from the driver's seat, climbed in, and peeled out of the driveway in a hurry. He needed time to think about the phone call he'd just received, and a chance to calm down in private. He hadn't wanted to believe it when Charlie Cooper called to tell him that Daniel had been causing mischief around town with a few other boys, but all the facts added up. Charlie said the boys had been out the night before. Daniel had gone with Brian to Crane's track practice, but it wasn't uncommon for Brian to leave him in Murphys to hang out with his friends while he was at the high school on the other side of town. The boys had gone ahead and egged a bunch of houses in Murphys. At least a dozen eggs were missing from the McFadden kitchen. It wasn't like Daniel to make trouble like this with other people, but he had not been himself lately. He was obviously trying to figure out who he was and where he fit in with his friends, but Adam wasn't so sure he liked the path the kid was taking.

He had been able to handle the newly developed backtalk, after all, he got it from the other boys every day. He could get over Daniel's arguments that he was too old for a bed time, and he was fine with Brian's quick cure for the boy's newly acquired smoking habit. What he had trouble with though was the wild streak the kid was developing, the one that went against everything they were raising him to believe.

Adam often thought about the day that past summer when he learned Daniel and Evan were lying about the amount of penny candy in their paper bags at the store. Mr. Smith trusted the kids enough to count out their own candy, and never questioned them about it, but Adam caught on one day when he noticed that his brothers had a good five dollars of candy between them after only paying seventy-five cents for it.

That had been a hard day for both Adam and Brian, as they tried to figure out what to do. Adam knew that he risked having his parenting skills called into question if he made the boys tell Mr. Smith the truth, but in the end, he decided it had to be done. He had even been relieved that Mr. Smith was kind enough to keep the incident to himself. He did ban the boys from buying candy until Christmas, but Adam thought that it was a small price for his two little thieves to have to pay.

Throwing eggs at houses was a new low for Daniel though, and Adam could hardly wrap his head around the fact that the kid was turning into such a troublemaker. He wanted to drive around Murphys to examine the damage himself. Charlie had explained that Mrs. Simms caught sight of her neighbor Billy egging Old Pete's transport truck while he was turning onto the highway. When Billy's mother found out she confronted her son, who admitted that Daniel, among others, was one of the culprits.

"I want them to clean up their mess after church tomorrow," Charlie had said over the phone. "Next week I'm going to get all of the boys involved to pick up trash at the football field instead of practicing with the rest of the team."

"I understand," Adam said, knowing that was one week's worth of football pay down the drain. "I can't apologize enough for what happened. I don't know what he was thinking."

Charlie laughed. "He probably wasn't thinking at all. None of them were. Being a kid makes you do stupid stuff. I once drove my uncle's truck straight into Angels Creek for no good reason. I wouldn't worry much about your brother, I just thought you should know."

But Adam did worry, not only about his brother's wayward behaviour, but about the fact that Daniel was potentially putting all of them at risk. It had been two whole years since a social worker set foot through their front door, and Adam aimed to keep it that way for good. As he drove around town though, the sight of a few different buildings caught his eye. The windows at Marie's restaurant had been hit pretty bad, and Adam could see that one of the young cooks from the kitchen had been instructed to clean up the mess. There were a few other storefronts that received the same treatment, and when he turned off Main Street and onto one of the side roads, Adam noticed that a bunch of cars were peppered with eggshells and dried up yolks.

He had really come in search of Old Pete's transport truck though, the one Mrs. Simms said he had been driving when the kids attacked him. As far as Adam was concerned, egging people's houses was an inexcusable offence, but putting someone in danger by attacking them while they were driving was almost unforgivable. And poor Old Pete, who lost a foot as a young man in World War Two, only to be ambushed by a bunch of no good kids thirty years later when he was just trying to do his job. Adam knew Daniel and his friends were uncomfortable around Pete because he wore a prosthetic. Adam had been uncomfortable too when he was their age, but he never dared treat him, or anyone else, with such blatant disrespect.

As he looped around Murphys to make his way home, Adam wasn't sure if his ride to town had helped calm him or rile him up worse. He was angry with Daniel, but confused too. Getting into trouble was one thing, and being one of seven boys, he had seen his fair share of it. But Daniel had never gone out of his way to be cruel before, and it really bothered Adam that his brother thought this behavior was acceptable. Making his way passed the elementary school a few minutes later, Adam saw that the front doors of the building had also been egged, and he felt his heart sink. He didn't know what had come over his little brother, but he knew he was going to have to put an end to his criminal behavior before it got any worse.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I just wanted to give a quick thank you to everyone who read my story, as well as those who reviewed! Here's Chapter Two. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter Two

"When is Adam coming home?"

After the warning his older brother had given him not to stray too far from the house, Evan was desperate to know what he could have done to earn such admonishment. Adam wanted to talk about chores, but Evan couldn't see why. He'd been trying his hardest to get all his work finished before anyone had to remind him, and it was almost hurtful that Adam was upset with him again. Still, the anticipation of their conversation was killing the boy, and he sought Brian out in the field to ask about their older brother, and seek a potential ally along the way.

"I didn't do anything wrong," Evan said, leaning over the top rung of the fence post and pleading his case to Brian and Crane as they worked to replace barbed wire. "Why is Adam mad at me?"

"You forgot to bring the eggs in," Crane said, not bothering to look up from his chore. "He probably just wants to remind you not to forget."

Evan's brown eyes narrowed as he glared at Crane, pale red hair casting a shadow across his brow. "I didn't forget anything. I brought a whole bowlful in this morning."

"You don't have to lie about it," Crane said in his matter of fact voice, only half paying attention to Evan anyway. "There weren't any eggs in the kitchen."

Brian took a step back from the fence and looked back and forth between both brothers. He could see the look of desperation on Evan's face, and was sure there was one of confusion on his. "Evan, I saw you carry them into the house this morning. They were there in the bowl when we left for football."

"I know it," Evan said. "So why is Adam mad at me?"

Crane shook his head. "The bowl was empty. Maybe you guys are thinking of the wrong day."

Brian wasn't convinced, and he was old enough to know better than to let things slide around their house without at least looking into them first. If an entire bowl of eggs was missing from their kitchen, their had to be a good reason for it, and he couldn't help but wonder if that was part of why Adam had disappeared to town in such a hurry. He wasn't going to say that to Evan though, not when the boy was already worried.

"Look," he told him, pushing the hair back from his brother's face with a gloved hand. "You don't have to worry about Adam. I'll make sure he knows that you did all your chores this morning."

"Thanks, Brian," Evan said, but he didn't sound particularly relieved as he climbed back down to the ground.

Hoping to cheer his brother some, Brian suggested that Evan find the other boys and go look after the horses. He knew Evan could handle the job on his own, but the animals always helped calm him, and besides that, it would mean all four younger kids were in one place while he and Crane worked to fix the fence. Although Evan seemed fine to check on the horses, Brian could see he looked defeated as he slowly made his way over to the barn to find the others. He couldn't dwell on it too long, though, not when he had his own work to do.

Turning back to the fence once more, Brian couldn't help but acknowledge how quiet Crane had been with him all day. The small exchange with Evan was the most he'd spoken since lunch, and the silence was getting on Brian's nerves. "Is everything okay with you?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"I don't know, you've been awfully quiet since this morning. It doesn't have anything to do with what Guthrie said to you earlier, does it?"

"Of course not." Though Crane tried to sound convincing, he couldn't fool his brother. "Besides, he was right. I am boring."

"Hold on a second, Crane. Guthrie never said you were boring. He just wanted to do chores with someone else for a change."

"Big difference." With a swing of the hammer, Crane brought it down hard against the fencepost, driving the barbed wire between wood and nail. "I'm not going trick or treating tomorrow. I already told Adam but I guess I should tell you too. I'm too old for that stuff."

Brian held his hands up in defeat. "Hey, you don't have to tell me twice." He wasn't a huge fan of Halloween himself, and he wasn't sure why his brother was suddenly so frustrated. Hoping to ease the tension, he jokingly asked, "Do you have other plans?"

"So what if I do?" Crane twisted away from the fence to face his brother, his jaw tightened with a sense of defiance.

Brian couldn't figure out what had brought on his usually even tempered brother's angst, but he knew when to hold back a laugh. The lanky teen had grown considerably taller over the past few months, though he still had a couple inches to go before he was as big as Brian. As he stood there with the hammer in hand and his shaggy hair a wild, wind blown mess, for the first time ever, Brian thought it would be a bad idea to mess with Crane McFadden.

"All right," Brian said, his voice calm as he let out a slow breath. "Are you going to tell me what's going on, or do I have to stand here guessing all day?"

"There's nothing going on," Crane said, his voice nearing a whine. "It's just that everyone else in school has plans tonight, and the only thing I'm supposed to do this weekend is take my little brothers trick or treating."

"Don't think for a second that your being there doesn't mean something to the boys," Brian said, a little hurt that Crane was taking things so personally. "But I understand your frustration. Did all your friends get invited to a party or something?"

"Yeah. I got invited too."

Suddenly aware of the problem, Brian wanted to make sure he knew a few more details before he spoke his mind. "Oh, and just where is this party supposed to be?"

Crane hesitated, wondering if this was going to be one of the rare times Brian decided to pull the big brother card on him. "I'm not sure."

"Who invited you?"

"Cathy Breyers."

"So, why don't you go?"

"I don't want to."

 _Good Lord._

"Am I missing something, Crane? You just told me that you were invited to a party, that you have other things to do rather than take your brothers out on Halloween, and now you're saying you don't want to go? So what, you don't like Cathy or something?"

"I like her."

"So, the problem is what, exactly?"

"Maybe I don't feel like going to a party full of drunk teenagers."

"Then why bring it up at all?"

"Because Cathy's going to be there."

Despite the fact that they were now talking in circles, Brian was well aware of Crane's issue. He felt a little sorry for his brother too, who seemed to feel the need to be perfect, and feared making any mistakes. "I'm just taking a guess here, but would it be safe to say that you're worried about Cathy meeting some other guy at the party?"

"Of course not," he said, but a moment later added, "I don't know. I only ever see her at school, but there are going to be tons of people there. She probably won't even think of me if there are other guys around."

"Listen, I know it's none of my business, but maybe you don't want to get involved with a girl who turns her head every time a new guy walks in the room."

Crane started to blush. "She's not like that."

"Then why are you worried about it?"

"I don't know. It's just that I'm sure the second she meets the guys at this party, she'll forget all about me and go for someone more exciting. What's fun about me?"

"Don't beat yourself up like that."

"I'm not. What girl would be interested in a guy who spends more time looking after his little brothers than he does hanging out after school? Cathy probably wants someone who can take her to parties and other fun places."

"What makes you think you're not that kind of guy? You're going to have your license in a few weeks."

"I've never even been to a party."

Getting slightly frustrated with the lack of progress in their conversation, Brian hung his hammer against the fence and crossed his arms over his chest. "Tell me something, Crane. When was the last time you asked either me or Adam if you could go out?"

"Never."

"When was the last time you asked if you could stay in town with friends after school?"

"I - I haven't."

"Then what makes you think you can't go out and be with your friends just like any kid your age?"

"What about the farm and-"

"Don't give me that. I've gone out plenty of times on weekends and you know Adam has too. What makes you think that you can't do the same thing, when you're only fifteen?"

Crane shrugged. "It doesn't matter. Adam will never let me go to a house party all the way on the other side of Murphys."

Slowly, Brian started to shake his head. "Do you know how many parties Adam and I went to when we were in high school?"

"How many?"

"All of them." Brian uncrossed his arms and tried to force a smile. "You might find that if you actually talked to us about what you're feeling, that we could help you out. If you want to go to the party tonight, you can."

"I don't know if I want to go."

"We wouldn't be having this conversation if you didn't. Come on, Crane. You wouldn't let something like this beat you up if you didn't care about it. I know you. So why don't you just go?"

"I don't have any way of getting there."

"Me or Adam will drive you."

"How will I get home?"

"We'll pick you up. Stop looking for a reason to miss out on the fun."

Though Brian wouldn't say it out loud, he was actually relieved that Crane was showing an interest in something outside of school work and chores. The kid worked hard at school, everyone could see it, and he was a bigger help at home than either Brian or Adam had been at his age. But he was uptight, and he didn't know when to give himself a break. Brian wasn't about to let him give up an opportunity for a night off from his own high standards.

There was a look on Crane's face that bothered Brian, one of nervousness, and he wondered, for what must have been the hundredth time, if they were asking too much from him. Back when he was in high school, Brian had enjoyed every opportunity for fun, and he loved nothing more than to cruise around with his friends on weekends and spend his free afternoons in town. Crane was different though, and too much time away from the farm seemed to make him anxious. School was all right, since it was a safe place for him to study. Brian knew that Crane's friends often invited him out, he even heard them a few times, but the teen always had an excuse, and this time, Brian was more than willing to let his brother go and enjoy being a teenager for once.

"What do you think Adam will say?" Crane asked a while later as they resumed their work. "Do you think he'll be all right with me going? What if he says no?"

Brian was a little hurt that Crane placed so much stock in Adam's opinions, but he understood where it came from. Adam expected more from their brothers, or at least appeared to, while Brian was often more accepting on the surface.

"He'll be fine with it," Brian said simply, afraid to admit that Adam would probably be overjoyed to see Crane loosen up a bit. It was true that the two oldest McFadden boys had a great deal of pressure on their shoulders to keep their younger brothers safe, especially if they wanted to keep custody of them, but there were some things they were a little more understanding about. Though he didn't want any of their brothers getting wild, he thought it was only fair for Crane to enjoy a bit of the fun he had been allowed only four short years ago.

While Brian and Crane continued their work on the fence, Adam sat in the truck at the end of their long driveway, listening to the calming sounds of country music on the radio and trying to figure out what he was going to say to Daniel. He wasn't thrilled with all the changes this brother was going through, and while he understood that it was impossible for a kid to grow up without making a few mistakes along the way, he couldn't help but feel a deep seeded disappointment in his brother. Daniel knew better than to do what he'd done, heck, all of the boys involved did, but he knew it wouldn't help to chase the kid down and start yelling at him. No good could come from being a tyrant, so he was going to sit alone until his own nerves had settled enough to go back and face the boy.

By the time he returned to the house, everything was quiet. Someone had tidied the kitchen after lunch, and though there was a plate of sandwiches left out for Adam, he didn't think he could eat right then. He was hungry, but he knew he would only get sick if he tried to force food into his stomach. Eventually, after a search of the house and yard, he found all four of his youngest brothers in the barn, where they seemed to be looking after the horses together. Despite the lump in his throat, Adam couldn't help but smile when he saw them like this, happy and looking out for each other as they played.

If he hadn't known any better, he could have guessed that the boys got on like this all the time. They didn't argue and no one tried to one-up the other. There was no competition amongst them when it came to the animals. There was no sign of mischief on any of their faces, but Adam knew from experience how different children could be in their home life, from the one they showed in public. Right about then, twelve-year-old Daniel was proving to be the polar opposite of the way he'd acted in town.

Despite the anger and disappointment that seared within him, Adam did not want to cause a scene for Daniel in front of the others. He waited in the entrance of the barn when he saw Brian and Crane returning from the field, and quietly stepped outside to speak with Brian.

"Do me a favor," Adam requested, whispering to Brian so even Crane wouldn't hear. "Keep everyone outside for a while. I want to talk to Daniel in the house."

"What's going on?"

Adam was about to explain, but he caught sight of Evan watching them from the door and decided it best to keep quiet for now. "I'll tell you after. I just need some time alone with Daniel."

"Yeah, all right." Brian seemed hesitant, but he trusted his brother enough to do as he requested. "Hey, you guys," he called out, distracting the others as Adam pulled Daniel aside. "What do you say we go for a ride down to the lake?"

With the excitement of a horseback ride on their minds, no one noticed Adam and Daniel slip outside and head toward the house. Daniel didn't seem particularly nervous, and Adam guessed that he had no clue that he was in trouble.

"What's going on?" Daniel asked as his brother took him through the back door into the kitchen. "Why aren't we going with Brian and the others?"

"I was thinking we would make some brownies." Adam said, motioning to the counter. "Why don't you grab the eggs while I set the oven?"

There was an immediate look of hesitation on Daniel's face, but he slowly replied, "Okay."

Adam leaned against the kitchen table and watched as Daniel stood frozen with his back to him.

After a moment, the boy shrugged. "I don't see the eggs."

"You don't?"

"N – no. Where are they?"

"Why don't you tell me?"

As Daniel's shoulders slumped forward, his back still to his older brother, Adam slowly crossed the room, heels of his boots clacking against the hardwood floor as he moved. Taking a solid grip on Daniel's shoulder, Adam turned his brother to face him. Daniel stared straight ahead, his blue eyes locked on Adam's ribcage.

Finally, Adam drew a heavy breath. "Anything you want to tell me?"

Daniel barely managed to whisper, "Not really."

"All right, then." Adam pulled his hand from Daniel's shoulder and moved it to his chin, tilting it up until Daniel was looking him in the eyes. Still, the boy refused to make contact glancing away instead. "I'm going to tell you what I know. If I'm right, you just nod along. But if I'm wrong, this is your one and only chance to speak up for yourself. Understand?"

All Adam received in reply was a restrained nod of the head.

"You stole eggs last night," Adam began, "and brought them with you to Murphys."

Daniel nodded again.

"Then you and your friends went and egged a good chunk of the town. The general store, Marie's. You got the school too, and a few houses."

Another nod, and this time Daniel held his breath. It sounded worse the way Adam said it, like they had planned to hit that many buildings.

"You guys egged Old Pete's truck while he was turning off the highway."

"No-"

"Mrs. Simms saw you. Are you calling her a liar, or are you lying to me now?" Daniel went silent, and Adam squeezed his chin a little tighter. "It's your only chance to defend your actions."

The boy whispered something Adam did not understand, and when prompted to speak up, he said, "I can't defend myself. Mrs. Simms was telling the truth."

"You threw eggs at Pete's truck while he was driving it?"

"I guess so."

"You guess so, or you did?"

"I did."

"Even though you knew it was dangerous?"

"Yeah."

"Did you throw eggs at him, or was it just your friends who threw them while you watched?"

After a long pause, Daniel admitted, "I did it too."

"Thank you," Adam whispered, "for telling me the truth. It doesn't mean I'm not disappointed about what you did, but I appreciate that you're being honest."

Daniel blushed, and struggled under Adam's grip to look away. He hadn't been honest about everything, and prayed the whole truth would never come out.

"What happened to the eggs this morning?"

"Huh?" The question shook Daniel from his thoughts.

"You egged the town last night, but the eggs were missing this morning. Did you take them too?"

"I brought them to football practice."

"Why?"

"I was going to do more this afternoon, but Brian made me come home."

"Where are the eggs?"

"In my room."

Adam nodded in understanding. "I guess you know that's where the two of us are headed next."

"I figured."

"I want you to know, Daniel, before we go upstairs, that I'm extremely disappointed in you. You know better than to deface anyone's property the way you did, but the fact that you were planning on doing it again today makes it worse. And to shoot eggs at an old man while he's driving a transport truck that he doesn't even own? You know if he got into an accident he would have been badly hurt. He could have lost his job too."

Daniel didn't say anything this time, knowing that Adam wasn't looking for an excuse. He was just giving him a good reason why he shouldn't have done what he did. And while Daniel knew there were no excuses for his behavior, he had secretly enjoyed himself. Following Adam toward the stairs, though, he guessed that he wasn't about to enjoy much of anything else that weekend.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Just wanted to say thanks again for the reviews! Also, in reply to Just a Reviewer's question, I'm actually not sure about the eye color, thanks for pointing it out! I took reference from memory (and some pretty grainy video footage), so I made a guess on the coloring. Anyway, here's the new chapter everyone, enjoy!

Chapter Three

As Adam led Daniel into the boy's upstairs bedroom, he couldn't help but notice the look of trepidation on his young brother's face. At that moment, he wanted to do nothing more than wrap an arm around the kid and tell him that they would move beyond this eventually, but he knew better than to offer such comfort yet. Daniel needed to learn that his actions were unacceptable.

"Sit down," Adam instructed, shutting the door behind him and waiting as Daniel took a seat on his bed.

This wasn't their first private talk, and Daniel knew the drill pretty well by now. Adam took a seat across from him on Crane's bed, the distance between the two of them little wider than the boys' shared nightstand. He wasn't really sure where to begin their conversation. All he did know was that it was going to be a long one. "Do you want to start explaining yourself or should I just ask questions?"

"You already know what happened." There was a tone of defiance in Daniel's voice, but Adam wasn't going to put up with it for long.

"Don't press your luck with the attitude, buddy. I'm not happy with you as it is. Now, I want to know what you were thinking. Whose idea was this anyway?"

"I don't know."

"Was it yours?"

"Of course not!" His blue eyes flashed with anger. "I wouldn't do that."

"Really?" Adam struggled to keep his tone even, and was surprised at how quickly he felt his temper rising. "You were involved. You took the eggs and you obviously knew it was going to happen. Is it really a stretch to think that you came up with the idea too?"

"No, but I'm telling you it wasn't my me."

"Okay. But you knew about it ahead of time?"

"Yeah, I guess I did."

"Did you stop and think about it for a moment, or consider that it might be the wrong thing to do?"

"Adam, it wasn't that bad. Remember when Evan and Ford had that paint fight on the porch last year? That was a lot harder to clean up than a few busted eggs."

"I'm glad you feel that way, because tomorrow after church, you and your buddies are going to scrub every last drop of egg from town, and you're going to apologize too."

"No," Daniel said, but quickly caught himself. "I mean, I will clean up the mess, but you can't expect us to say sorry to everyone."

"Oh, yes I can."

"They'll be mad."

"Which they have every right to be." Adam wasn't sure where this backtalk was coming from, but he didn't like it one bit. He reached forward and tapped Daniel's knee, and at least the boy looked him in the eye then. "What you did yesterday was irresponsible and mean, and I think you know it. Brian never would have let you stay in town alone if he thought this was what you were up to."

"I know." Although he wasn't apologizing, Adam was glad that his brother at least had the decency to look ashamed.

"I can understand you wanting to have a bit of fun with your friends, but you racked up a whole list of trouble in one night."

"We just made a little mess," Daniel said, more out of desperation than anything. "It wasn't that bad."

"You don't think so? Why don't we take a second and think about how much trouble you caused?" Adam held up his hand. "You stole eggs, which we eat and we sell. Even though you're free to eat as many as you want, you know better than to waste them." He held up one finger. "You lied to Brian." Another finger was ticked off. "You defaced people's homes and businesses." A third finger went up, and along with it, Daniel's face turned red. "You planned to do it again today, and worst of all, you put an old man's life in danger."

By the end, Adam had ticked off all five fingers on his left hand. He waited for his brother to reply. When the boy remained silent, Adam lowered his hand.

"You want to tell me again how it was just a little mess?"

"I'm sorry, Adam."

"Seems to me that the only reason you're saying that is because we're up here now. I don't think you would have cared much otherwise. In fact, I'm willing to bet that you would have gone to school Monday and laughed about it with your friends."

Daniel squirmed in his seat, his guilt ridden face enough to prove Adam's statement correct.

"Do you have any idea, Daniel, what would have happened if Mrs. Simms decided to call the police instead of your football coach? All of you boys might have been charged with vandalism, and in case you've forgotten, we can't afford for any one of us to get in trouble with the law. Social services would pull you kids out of here so fast it would make you sick."

He inched closer to his brother, their knees nearly touching. That's when he saw the tears in Daniel's eyes. _Good,_ he thought. _Maybe I'm getting through to him._

"Look, I know you thought you were having fun, but did you ever consider things like juvie, or the fact that all five of you could be taken from me and Brian if someone from the county deemed us unfit to raise you?"

"That's not fair," Daniel said. "None of my friends have to worry about getting taken away when they do stuff like this."

"Life isn't always going to be fair. It's not your fault that you have to be more careful than some of your friends, but that's just the way things are for our family. Nothing we can do to change it."

"It was just a prank."

"That may be so, but you could have done some terrible damage last night. You probably scared the heck out of Pete, and he could have been hurt real bad. You might have broken someone's window or damaged property, and that would have cost money. Lots of money we don't have."

Daniel sniffled. "None of that happened."

"Which is why you should count yourself lucky. You are twelve-years-old Daniel, and I expect you to be able to think through your actions. I don't expect that you'll be perfect all the time, but you had to have known that egging houses was a bad idea."

With a sigh, Daniel slumped forward, resting his elbows on his knees and hanging his head low. "Didn't you ever want to fit in with your friends?"

Adam watched a moment and ran a hand through his own dark hair before moving over to the other bed. He pushed the brown bangs back from Daniel's eyes, which were now tear filled and so watery that he almost felt sorry for the kid. Almost.

"Don't think for a minute that I didn't do some stupid stuff when I was your age." Despite the comment, Adam hoped he didn't sound too sympathetic. "I knew some of it was wrong before I even got into it too, so yeah, I know what it's like to do something because of your friends. I know what it's like to convince yourself that you're not doing anything wrong because you're acting with others. Did you feel even a little bit bad about it after you walked away yesterday?"

Daniel thought long and hard before answering. Adam hoped he wasn't trying to come up with a lie. "I was scared when Brian came to get u – uh, to get me. I thought he would find out. But once we got home I didn't think about it again."

"You took more eggs this morning."

"Yeah, but Adam, I never even thought about the social services people coming in. You're supposed to be in charge now."

"I am, and they're probably gone for good. But what you have to understand, little brother, is that sometimes, even in families with both a mother and father, social services will step in if they think the kids aren't being taken care of. There are a lot of us in this family and if everyone starts getting into trouble around town, I can't promise that someone won't step in to check on us."

"I don't want to go anywhere else. I only did those things last night for fun. I know it was wrong, but I didn't think it was that bad. More like sneaking a cookie from the kitchen than stealing from the store." Daniel looked away then, remembering the incident with the candy earlier that year. "I guess I've been a pretty terrible kid lately."

Adam squeezed the back of Daniel's neck in a gesture of reassurance. "It's normal to make mistakes growing up, and I don't want you to beat yourself up about that. But I do want you to use your head before you act. You're old enough to think a situation through before you walk into it. It doesn't mean choices are always going to be easy, but it does mean you have to be responsible for yourself. I can accept that you stole the eggs, and even that you threw them at houses, but why go after Pete? Why attack a harmless old man?"

"We didn't know it was him. We just saw this big truck coming and by the time we realized who it was, it was too late. I know it doesn't make it better, but we didn't do it just because it was Pete. We were stupid, that's all."

Though Adam didn't like the way his brother was talking about himself, he did not try to correct him. Instead, he leaned back a bit and pointed to the B.B. gun that hung on the back of the closet door. "I used to have a gun just like yours. Then, I guess when I was about your age, Dad took it away from me."

"Why?" Daniel tried not to sound too interested, but he secretly loved to hear stories about his older brother's youth.

"I'd had my gun for a couple years, but I wasn't supposed to take it off the ranch without permission. You know how it is, we're only supposed to use it for hunting and stuff. Then one day a couple kids at school started picking on my friends, and we got it in our heads that we should ambush them on their way home. I sneaked my gun to school and skipped the bus ride home to go after the other guys. The whole time I was waiting behind the bushes with my friends, I knew that what we were doing was wrong, and I sure as heck knew better than to aim any kind of gun at another person, but I was too excited to back down. I told myself that I was helping my friends, and that it would have been cowardly to back down to a bunch of bullies. Except it was more cowardly to fight, and when one of those guys got hit in the ear with a B.B. and started bleeding, it was cowardly to run away."

Daniel's eyes went wide, his face pale. "You hit him?"

Adam nodded. "One of us did, I don't know who. But I did know that someone was probably going to find out about it. It took me so long to walk the rest of the way home that night, that Dad and Mom had already heard about the ambush. Dad took one look at me with the gun in my hand and knew I was involved."

"Was he mad?"

"What do you think? He said that even if none of the other kids got hurt, it was still a terrible thing to have done. I knew it too. I guess that's why I wasn't too disappointed when he took my gun away. Part of me knew he was going to take it the second I brought it to school."

"What about the kid that got hit? Was he okay?"

"Yeah, he didn't get much worse than a little nick behind the ear, and he left my friends alone after that too. But I still felt bad, and it was worse knowing Mom and Dad were so disappointed in me. Dad told me he was angry with himself for thinking he could trust me, and that made me feel worse than anything."

"How long until you got your gun back?"

Adam smiled. "Going on ten years this spring. By the time he was ready to give it back, I was old enough for a real gun. Mine's still up in the attic somewhere. I guess I understand how Dad felt though, thinking I was ready for something I wasn't. I think Brian and I have been making a mistake letting you hang out in town alone."

"Aw Adam, we've been alone in town since we were little kids."

"Not anymore," Adam said, his tone stern enough to remind Daniel that he was still in plenty of trouble. "From now on, you don't go into town, or stay there alone, unless one of your older brothers is with you."

Figuring Adam would change his mind about that in a few weeks, Daniel nodded his acceptance.

"We've got to talk about a few other things too. You stole eggs from me, and you're going to have to pay me back. How many eggs do you think you stole?"

"Including the ones I still have?"

Adam nodded.

"Twenty-one."

"Then that's how many extra chores you're going to do."

"What?" Daniel wrinkled his nose. "That's impossible. I thought you said I had to pay for them. Like with money, or something."

"You don't have money. So you can pay off your debt by working instead. One chore equals one egg."

"Am I going to have to do them all today?"

"No. I want you to remember this for a while. Every day you will do one extra chore. That will last three weeks. Charlie told me that next week, any kid who was involved in this is going to have to clean the field instead of going to football practice. I pay good money for you boys to play, and I don't get it back when you miss practice. So, you can pay me that too, with another week's worth of chores. Consider it an alternative to being grounded all month."

"It's pretty much the same."

"Yeah, except you'll still have some time to yourself. Tomorrow, you can clean the mess in town. You have to apologize to Brian for lying to him. He won't be happy with you."

"What if he wants to punish me too?"

"He won't," Adam promised, and Daniel held his breath, guessing where this was going. "Remember what I told you about Dad taking my B.B. gun away?"

Daniel barely managed to nod his head, but gave a small squeak in reply. "Uh huh."

"Well, that was only part of it. I reckon after learning that I tried to shoot someone, he felt the same way I felt today when I heard you threw eggs at Pete. I know you didn't know he was in there, but you knew someone was driving and you put that person's life in danger. So for that, I'll give you the same thing Dad gave me."

Daniel blinked back fresh tears. "A licking?"

Pushing his hand through Daniel's hair again, Adam nodded. "I really hate this part, but I can't let you get away with this."

The boy tried to look unfazed. "I figured this was what you had in mind when you brought me upstairs. But you're making me do all these extra chores, and I'm going to clean up the mess. I don't need anything else."

"This will be for trying to harm another person. You knew better, and you deserve it too. You know that, right?"

"Sure, but it doesn't make it any easier."

Adam forced a smile, but he knew this was going to be difficult to do. "You're getting older, so this time things are going to be a little different."

"I'm really sorry, Adam," Daniel said, suddenly overcome with panic. As tears began to stream down his face, he managed to ask, "What are you gonna do?"

With his hand still on the back of Daniel's head, Adam began to rub slow circles at the base of his neck. He could see the boy feared the worst, as though some horrible torture awaited him. Somehow, it was difficult for Adam to explain this when he was still trying to figure it out himself. Guessing it would be easiest to go from the memory of what had happened to him, he tried to verbalize the arrangement.

"I want you to understand how serious I am about you putting other people in danger. You don't have the right to hurt other people unless you expect to get hurt in return. So I want you to remember this. I'm not going to put you over my knee this time. Instead, you can lean across the desk, and take a few licks from my belt."

Daniel shook his head, but tried to wipe the tears away. "You can't. You've never done that before."

"You've never done anything this bad before. I love you more than anything, and I hate to hurt you, I really do. But I can't have you causing problems for others. Can you imagine how awful you would feel if someone had been seriously injured because of you?"

This seemed to break Daniel. He may have done a foolish thing, but never in a million years would he go out of his way to hurt someone. In a sign of acceptance, he straightened up, shook himself free of Adam's hold, and asked, "How many?"

Adam was caught off guard by the question, but once he realized what Daniel meant, he knew he had to commit to a number of strikes. "Five," he said. "One for stealing the eggs, two for lying to Brian, three for throwing the eggs, four for doing it to Old Pete, and five for thinking you would do it again." The number seemed fair in Adam's eyes, but what he had not told his brother, and what he hoped Daniel would never find out, was that five was relatively low. When Adam got into trouble with the B.B. gun, his father had given him twelve licks, one for each year of his age. Adam knew he couldn't do that to Daniel, and he couldn't do it to himself either. This was going to be hard on both of them as it was, and Adam knew that it would only be harder if he made the number too high. Besides, five was going to hurt plenty, and with a month of chores ahead of him, he knew Daniel wouldn't forget his message any time soon.

Daniel stood up before Adam did, nervous, but wanting to get things over with. He wasn't exactly sure what to do with himself, and needed his brother to guide him in where to go next.

"Come this way," Adam said, his voice little louder than a whisper as he stood next to his brother and took gentle hold of his arm. Leading him to the desk in the corner of the room, he pulled the chair out and moved it to the wall, knowing it would only get in his way. Casting a glance down at his brother, he was suddenly struck with emotion, and thought that Daniel looked particularly defeated. He recalled being that age and feeling invincible to the world when he was away from home. He felt so grown up and in control of himself, but the second he was up in that bedroom with his father, he felt like a little kid again, foolish, and embarrassed of his actions.

He guessed that Daniel probably felt the same way right then, but there was something Adam understood now that he was on the grown up end of the conversation. Daniel wasn't going to be a kid forever, and there would be more times in his life that he had to make decisions that would affect those around him. If he didn't learn now that he had a responsibility to himself and to society, Adam didn't know where the boy would ever learn that lesson. And, as much as it tore him up inside to do it, there was another part to this that his father had done, that he knew he was going to follow.

Motioning to the button of Daniel's jeans, he said, "Take those down."

At the sound of Adam's request, Daniel took a step back. It wasn't the first time he'd been punished this way, but it had never been with a belt before and Daniel didn't know if he could handle it.

"I won't break you," Adam promised him, echoing the words of his father ten years earlier.

As much as Daniel trusted his brother, he couldn't hide his shaking hands as he reached for the button on his pants. He prayed silently that Adam would let him keep his underwear on, but didn't dare ask the question out loud for fear that it might put the idea in Adam's head. Once he had the jeans pushed down to just above his knees though, Adam pulled him closer to the desk.

This was the point that Adam looked the least forward to, but he thought it was important for Daniel to understand how lonely things could be for people who disrespected others. Normally this sort of punishment in their house was softened by the added comfort of close touch. Usually that meant being draped across his knee, but this time Adam promised himself he wouldn't do it. He almost wanted to call the whole thing off, but Daniel had to learn from his mistake, and Adam had made a commitment to raise these boys right, the way their parents would have wanted.

"Just lean over the edge and rest your hands flat," Adam instructed, struggling not to let his own voice crack as he helped his brother bend across the desk. He saw the way Daniel tensed when he reached for his belt, and the way he held his breath as he pulled it through the loops.

 _Ugh._ Looking at the faded, doubled over strap of leather in his hand, Adam began to worry about how he was going to use it. He'd been hit with it plenty of times, but he'd never used it on someone else before. Part of him had hoped he never would, but as the boys grew older he realized that it would probably be necessary. Still, he didn't like it, and he was sure he wanted to get it over with just as much as Daniel did.

"No more stealing," Adam said, lecturing now more for his own sake of procrastinating than for Daniel. "I don't want you taking anything from this house, or anyone else's place, again." With that, he raised his arm into the air, just high enough that he could flick his wrist back a second later and swing the belt against Daniel's boxer clad backside.

Both of them sucked in a breath as the belt struck Daniel, their voices silenced by the sharp echo of the swat. Daniel felt the sting a moment later and though he lowered his head and squeezed his eyes shut tight, he didn't make another sound. He knew there were only four licks left, and though it didn't sound like much, he wondered if he could get through them without breaking into a sobbing mess.

Adam studied his brother a moment, and he saw as Daniel began to relax again. He didn't mean to drag the punishment out, but he really wanted the message to sink in deep. "Next time one of us asks you where you're going, or what you're doing, I want you to tell the truth."

As the belt came down a second time, Daniel's pained whine could be heard, but Adam stayed quiet. He watched again, waiting for the boy to regain composure, and wanting nothing more than to stop right there. But he had to go on.

"You are never allowed to deface other people's property," Adam said, striking him a third time. "Ever."

Daniel hissed, and with a shaking voice, replied, "I know."

For a moment Adam thought Daniel might collapse on the desk, more so from emotional overload than pain. But if it was affecting him emotionally it was a good thing, because it meant he would think next time he acted.

For Daniel's part he was emotional, but there was more to it than that. It wasn't until that third strike that he realized how much he missed Adam's comforting grip around his waist, the one that was usually there to keep him in place and remind him throughout the punishment that he was still loved. Daniel knew Adam loved him, but he started to worry, in the midst of searing pain and lonely tears, if he had done some kind of damage to their relationship that couldn't be fixed. He wondered if he was supposed to apologize, but Adam was saying something else then, something about being kind to people like Old Pete, and Daniel was having a hard time figuring out what to –

"Argh!" he cried out loud this time, having been so lost in his own self-pity that he didn't realize Adam was ready with another lick. Caught by surprise, he couldn't hold in the gasping sob that escaped his lips, or stop himself from stomping his foot against the bedroom floor. He wanted to reach back, unsure of how something as quick as a few strikes of leather could cause him so much pain. But he didn't dare do it, and instead managed to choke out, "I'm sorry."

"I know," Adam whispered, and suddenly Daniel realized that despite his usual touch, Adam was still at his side, close enough to be looking out for him. "Last one," Adam reminded him, "and I want you to remember it. You should never have fun at the expense of others. Got it?"

Daniel nodded, hoping his brother wouldn't know just how bad he was crying, and bit his lip to prepare himself for the last lick. He nearly drew blood as he sank his teeth into the skin to keep from screaming, but he had expected the pain. Adam always made the last strike harder than the others as a way of finishing things off, and nothing had changed about that this time.

As Daniel struggled to steady his breathing, Adam quietly put his belt back on and blinked away his own tears. He wondered why it was so hard to do things like this. He could remember when he was a kid, and getting so mad at Brian or Crane that he actually wanted to hurt them, even though he never did. As he grew a little older, especially into his teen years, he used to complain that his parents let the younger boys get away with too much, as though they should have been doling out discipline left, right, and centre. He hated to do it now. Sure, there were times when the kids had him so frustrated that he lost his temper without thinking, but he never once raised his voice or struck them without feeling like a complete jerk afterward.

This time was no different. Daniel deserved the licking, there was no denying that, but now that he saw his brother hunched over the desk, struggling to regain his composure during what was probably a pretty embarrassing event, Adam felt bad for being the one to cause this. He didn't want to force his brother to accept his comfort, but he knew he had to do something. Reaching out, he placed a hand on Daniel's shoulder, just enough to show him he was there if he wanted him.

Suddenly, Daniel twisted away from the desk and wrapped his arms around Adam's waist, burying his face into the young man's rib cage and sobbing out sorrowful tears. For his part, Adam gave a small, quiet laugh, surprised that his brother would be so desperate for his attention after what had just transpired. He wrapped one arm over Daniel's shoulders and pulled him closer, and rested the other one against the back of his head.

"You're okay," Adam whispered, leaning against the edge of the desk so he could keep his brother close. "It's over now."

"I know it was wrong." Daniel dug his fingers into the fabric of Adam's flannel shirt, his face hidden and his voice muffled. "I knew I shouldn't have done it, but I didn't want my friends to make fun of me."

"Well then, if you think it's worth a month of extra work and a tanning, you can keep right on doing stuff just because your friends want you to."

"I don't want to. I won't do it again."

Although Daniel's words were genuine, Adam knew that it was only a matter of time before his brother would be faced with peer pressure, and he knew it would be hard for him. "I don't expect you to go from this point on without making mistakes. I just want you to think long and hard before you make certain decisions to see if it's even worth it. All right?"

He felt Daniel nod his head, and when the boy went silent, Adam allowed him a few minutes to calm down in the comfort of his grasp. He realized that quite often the lecture and the comforting afterward took more time than the punishment itself. Sometimes, when he was younger, there was so much work to do on the farm that his father would be quick to hand out a punishment, but it would be all day before they got to talk about it. Adam hated those times, because that was when he had to go on about his day wondering if he was forgiven or even loved. He knew his father never meant to leave him that way, but that was the sort of man he was, worrying about their livelihood as much as he was about their wellbeing. It meant a lot, Adam thought, that he and Brian always took the time to look out for their brothers, even when it meant putting something else aside to do it. Which was why he was shocked a moment later when Daniel leaned his head back, and looked up at him with sad eyes.

"Do you hate me now?" the boy asked, his tears gone but traces still covering his cheeks and swollen face. "Because of what I did."

"How could you think that?" Adam forced as smile as he moved back to sit in the discarded desk chair, pulling Daniel along with him as he went. He paused a moment, motioning for the kid to pull his jeans back on, and waited until they were back in place to explain himself. "No matter what you do, or how bad you think it is, I will _always_ be here for you." He held Daniel in front of him, only having to glance up slightly to meet the standing boy's eyes. "There is nothing you can do that can make me hate you, do you understand? If I hated you I would let you go ahead and keep pulling pranks on people. I only did this because I care enough to make sure you turn out all right. Got it?"

Daniel couldn't look at Adam anymore, ashamed with himself for ever thinking his brother would hate him. As much as he felt like crying, he was suddenly overcome with exhaustion. When Adam pulled him close again, Daniel allowed himself to relax in his brother's grasp. Maybe he was too old to sit in his lap, but at that moment, with no one else around and feeling as tired as he did, Daniel closed his eyes and allowed Adam to rub slow circles in his back and whisper comforting words to him.

They remained that way for a while, until Adam realized that Daniel was about to fall asleep. He helped the boy over to his bed and had to laugh when, despite his heavy eyes, Daniel protested, "I'm too old for a nap."

"It's Saturday," Adam reminded him. "Enjoy the break while you can." He tucked a blanket around Daniel's shoulder before he finally left the kid, who was sleeping peacefully before his older brother was even out of the room. Part of Adam wondered if it was right to be so lenient after a punishment. Their father had never been quite so considerate, and once the boys' tears had dried and their composure was regained, they were expected to rejoin the rest of the family with brave faces. Sometimes Adam was quick to request the same, especially on busy days, but on a quiet weekend like this, after such a long talk, he thought it best to leave his brother to rest.

Daniel wasn't the only one who would need the break though. As much as Adam wished he didn't need it, he always found it best to take a few minutes for himself to reflect on the situation in private. As he descended the stairs in the silent house, he had the same thought he always had after dealing with one of his brothers. _Was that really necessary?_ Sure, he knew his brother deserved it, and yeah, it was the way he was raised, but did that make it okay? Would it really make a difference for Daniel if he had been allowed to go without a licking? Couldn't he have learned his lesson with a stern talking to and the prospect of upcoming chores?

He was still contemplating these thoughts as he stepped outside onto the porch, hoping to catch some fresh air before the others returned from their ride. He didn't have much luck though, since Brian was already halfway up the front path, and when he caught sight of his brother, he was quick to join him in the doorway.

"You weren't gone very long," Adam said.

"We went all the way to the river and back. I think you just lost track of time."

"Yeah, maybe."

Brian could see the distant look in his brother's eyes, one of regret and sadness that he too had felt a million times over the past few years. "Are you going to tell me what's been going on today, or is it just between you and Daniel?"

"Don't tell any of the others," Adam said, the same request he always had when sharing some parental secret with his brother. "Daniel doesn't need the world knowing."

"I won't tell. What's wrong?"

Adam took a deep breath, almost embarrassed to admit what had just transpired upstairs. He was in luck though, because Brian was able to guess the situation without much difficulty.

"I take it the two of you just had one of our famous McFadden brother _talks_?"

Adam rubbed at his tired, dry eyes a moment and replied, "Pretty much."

"What happened?"

"Remember that phone call I got earlier today? It was Charlie Cooper calling to say that Daniel and a few other kids from the football team were seen egging houses in town. Mrs. Simms saw them and she was decent enough not to call the police, but that doesn't mean they were right to do it. That's why I rode into Murphys, because I had to see it for myself. He even took more eggs this morning, but thankfully he didn't get a chance to use them."

Brian narrowed his eyes, and Adam knew right away that his brother was already suspicious about something. "When we rode by the store this morning I noticed the mess. I never guessed that one of ours had something to do with it." Not only did Brian think it was a pretty crummy thing to do, he wondered why his brother would do something that he knew would earn him a trip over Adam's or his knee without question.

"I told Daniel he has to work the stolen eggs off in chores, so if you can think of anything that needs doing around here, let me know. And he has to apologize to you too."

"Why me?" Brian hadn't been the one he egged, and he couldn't understand why his name was being dragged into this.

Adam thought his brother had already put two and two together, but realized that he was going to have to explain things further. "Daniel egged a bunch of places last night when you were at Crane's practice. He has to apologize for lying to you about why he wanted to stay in town."

Adam noticed when Brian's face fell a moment later, but before he had a chance to question him on it, Brian asked, "So, what are we going to do about Ford?"

"What about him?"

"He was in town with Daniel all night last night."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thanks again for reading and reviewing! Please enjoy the new chapter!

Chapter Four

If someone went ahead and punched Adam in the stomach right then, he wouldn't have been more surprised than he was to learn that Ford had been with Daniel during the entire egging incident. It had been hard enough for Adam to believe that Daniel was involved, and he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that sweet little Ford, the ten-year-old who sometimes worried that eating eggs might mean accidentally killing a baby chick, had tossed them at people's houses in town.

"Ford might not have been with Daniel the whole time," Adam said to Brian, but it was more wishful thinking than anything. "Maybe he was hanging out with his own friends."

"He doesn't have any friends his age hanging out around Murphys after dark. I only let him stay in town because I knew Daniel would be with him." Brian tapped his hand against the porch banister. "It isn't like any of the boys to act this way."

"I think Daniel did it to fit in with his friends," Adam said. "Even if he did have a bit of fun doing it. If Daniel felt pressure to go along with them, I can only imagine how Ford felt."

"Knowing Ford, he probably didn't throw any eggs." Despite the comment, Brian was quick to contradict himself. "But he never let on that there was anything wrong. Come to think of it, he was pretty happy when I picked them up last night, like he was in on a secret of some kind." Brian let his fist fall against the porch railing, shaking his head in disbelief. "I never should have left them alone."

"Don't blame yourself. Every single one of those boys, even Guthrie, knows how he's supposed to behave when he's in public. They've been left alone before and they've never done anything like this." Adam let out a loud sigh. "I just wish I'd known that Ford was involved before I punished Daniel."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"I wouldn't have used the belt on Daniel if I'd known Ford was in on it too."

Brian stood silent a moment, watching as a pained look came over Adam's face. He wasn't exactly shocked to learn that Daniel had been given a heavier dose than the palm of the hand, after all, he'd pulled enough stunts recently to warrant it a few times over. What did surprise Brian was the fact that Adam had actually used it on him, when he was typically pained to do much of anything physical.

"How'd he take it?" Brian asked, then immediately realized it was an odd question. What was stranger, though, was the fact that Adam offered up an answer.

"He was all right, considering the fact that he's never had it before. Besides, I let him keep his underwear on."

"Dad never did that for me."

"Me neither, but from the way Daniel cried, I'm pretty sure they both hurt just about the same."

"Is he okay?"

Adam looked almost hurt. "I didn't kill him, if that's what you're thinking."

"I never said-"

"I only gave him five licks."

"Five?" Brian had to laugh. "You're heartless."

With a glare, Adam said, "It's not funny."

All Brian could do was shake his head. "Man, you _are_ softer than Dad."

"I didn't have the heart to give him anymore. I don't know how Dad managed to give us worse. Part of me wonders why he thought it was necessary. I don't think Daniel could have handled getting twelve. You should have seen him Brian, and I wasn't even that hard on him."

Though Brian could sympathize with his brother's feelings, he knew there was a big difference between the two of them and their younger brothers. "Neither of us took things to heart the way Dan'l does. If he thinks one of us is disappointed in him, it nearly tears him apart inside."

"We never liked disappointing Dad. But you're right, Daniel carries things worse than we did. Heck, all the younger boys do."

Seeing that his brother still struggled with the issue, Brian patted his shoulder and tried to reassure him that he had done the right thing. "It's a crummy thing to have to do, but it doesn't mean Danny didn't have it coming." He sighed. "And I guess it doesn't change the fact that Ford was involved either."

"Nope." Of all the times Adam wished he could have a beer in his hands, this was it. There were a few in the fridge, but it was still early in the day and he liked to keep the drinking until after the younger boys were asleep. A few minutes earlier he felt sorry for what he'd had to do to Daniel, but after learning about Ford's involvement in the crime, he was seriously considering going back upstairs and pulling the kid out of bed to give him another dose of his belt. "Daniel never let on once that Ford was with him. I can't believe he would lie to me that way."

"He probably didn't see it as lying. I know it doesn't make it right, but he probably thought he was protecting Ford. He would never dream of ratting on any of our brothers if he thought you were going to use the belt on him too."

Adam leaned forward against the porch railing and rested his elbows on the worn out wood of the banister. "What am I supposed to do now? I can't pretend that I don't know Ford was there. It will come out soon enough and the second he learns that Daniel got in trouble it will eat the little guy up inside."

"That's true," Brian agreed, finding himself a seat on the rocking chair and kicking one of his legs up onto the railing next to Adam. "I don't think Ford should get away with it anyway. Do you know how much trouble we would be in if someone from town decided to call the police, or the people down at the county on us?"

"Of course I know. Why do you think I was so hard on Daniel?"

"I don't think Ford would have done this if he hadn't been with the older boys."

"Neither do I, but it doesn't matter anyway. There are going to be plenty of times that he is with older kids and will have to make tough decisions. I just don't know how to handle him over this."

"He'll have to do the chores too to make up for the eggs," Brian said, but it was more a guess than an actual suggestion.

"Yeah, and it will probably be easier for you and me if we get them to do the chores together." He glanced back at Brian with a bitter grin. "I don't think I can come up with forty-two extra jobs in the next month."

"I can," Brian muttered, but when Adam failed to reply he took it to mean that his suggestion was unwelcome.

"I'll send Ford with Daniel tomorrow, to help clean up the town. It's only fair."

Though Adam did not see, Brian nodded. There was the other part of the punishment that Brian knew was coming, but when Adam failed to suggest it, he decided to speak up. "You're not going to use your belt on Ford, are you?"

Adam shrugged. "Doesn't seem fair to use it on one boy and not the other."

"Lately, Danny's been in a lot more trouble than any of the other boys. He's older too, and he brought his little brother along."

"Still doesn't make it fair when Ford did just as much damage." Adam really didn't want to use a belt on Ford. The younger boy never needed much by way of physical discipline anyway, and he was so sensitive that it was almost harder for Adam to punish him than it was to correct Evan or Daniel.

"What if I'm the one to spank Ford?" Brian asked, his voice low, as though he was almost afraid to offer. "If I do it I won't have to use the belt."

"You hate doing it."

"So do you, but we know he deserves one, at least this time."

Adam only shook his head. "If I can punish Daniel, I can do the same to Ford. Just let me think about it for a while, all right? I don't want to say anything to anyone about it until I'm ready. Just so we're clear though, Evan wasn't involved too, was he?"

"Nah, he was at the school with me the whole time."

"That's a relief," Adam said, but he didn't sound particularly happy. A minute later, he stood straight and announced that he had better start getting supper ready. He moved passed Brian and toward the kitchen door at the other end of the porch, hoping the answer to his worries would somehow appear to him before long.

"How 'bout some good news for a change," Brian said, following Adam into the kitchen. "What would you say if I told you that our brother, Crane McFadden, is planning on going to a party tonight?"

Lost in his own thoughts as he pulled a can of Pepsi from the fridge, it took a moment for Brian's words to register in Adam's mind. Once they did, he gave a soft smile and cracked open his soda can. "And just when did he decide this?"

"A little while ago. He wasn't going to go, you know how Crane is. He would rather stay home with us than risk soiling his perfect fifteen-year-old reputation in town."

Adam might have laughed at Brian's words, but he was too proud of Crane to tease him for his upstanding personality. However, he wasn't disappointed to hear that he wanted to hang out with his friends for a change. "It'll be good for him to get away from us for a night. And to hang out with kids his own age."

"We're not so much older," Brian said, but the statement wasn't exactly true. Sure, Crane was only four years younger, but the difference in age seemed bigger than it would in a few years. Crane had only been twelve when their parents passed away. Not old enough to take on the parenting responsibilities that befell the older two, and while he was a great help, perhaps more than they deserved sometimes, he was still, at least in Adam's eyes, another one of their kid brothers.

"What time is this party?" Adam asked. "And where is it?"

All through high school Adam had wondered why his mother needed to know every little detail about where he was and who he was with. Now though, he understood how worried she was about him, and he felt sorry for giving her such a hard time about it when he could have answered her questions and been on his way.

"Crane still has to get more information," Brian said, and with a knowing glance added, "He's going to call Cathy to find out."

"Cathy?" Adam suddenly understood Crane's newfound desire for a social life. He laughed, taking another swig of soda. "I should have guessed that this party would have something to do with a girl."

Brian's grin was just as wide, but he made Adam promise not to tease Crane about it. "Any other day I would, but he's so close to changing his mind and staying home that I don't want to take the risk."

"I'm not going to say anything. Besides, you're the one he went to for permission."

"It wasn't like that." Brian realized he had been right to worry that Adam would be jealous that Crane went to him first. "He didn't even want to go, and I had to convince him. I think he's still a little worried that you're going to tell him no anyway."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because he thinks he isn't allowed."

Adam rolled his eyes. "When have I ever tried to keep him from being a normal kid? He's the one who puts pressure on himself."

"I know, but he doesn't have a partner in crime like you or I did. He has to figure most of this stuff out on his own, and he doesn't want to cross you. Look, I'll drive Crane to the party tonight, and I'll make sure he gets home safe too. Maybe you can spend that time talking to Ford."

"Lucky me," Adam grumbled, but he left it at that.

While Adam and Brian were busy talking, neither heard Crane return to the house. He stood in the doorway to the living room a moment, listening to their low voices in the kitchen. He heard them mention the party, but from the tone of their conversation it sounded like they had no plans to leave the kitchen, so Crane took the opportunity to tiptoe upstairs and slip quietly into the bedroom his two older brothers shared. Pushing the door closed behind him, he paused a moment, holding his breath and half expecting someone to come up and catch him in the room.

He was nervous about the party, and too embarrassed to ask his brothers for advice. Although it was Halloween, no one was going to be going in costume, and Crane wasn't sure how he was supposed to dress for a regular party. He guessed he should look better than he did at school, but not quite as nice as he would at a dance. He knew it wouldn't be a problem if he borrowed one of his brothers' shirts, and Adam's clothes were more likely to fit him than Brian's were. He felt strange though, putting effort into his appearance for the first time. Cathy didn't seem to go for any of the rich guys in town, but she was a pretty girl, and Crane didn't want her thinking he was some bum rancher with nothing but worn out blue jeans and tired old shirts.

His main reason for sneaking into the bedroom wasn't to find a shirt though, since he knew he would have no trouble borrowing one. What he really wanted was to grab some of Adam's cologne, the one his brother only wore on special occasions. It would have been humiliating to ask to use it, so instead Crane figured he would borrow it for a couple of hours, and put it back before he left for the party. He knew it wasn't technically stealing, and he just couldn't muster up the confidence to come out and ask for it.

He moved over to the little table next to Adam's bed. It was the drawer where Adam kept everything of value, from their birth certificates, to their parents' wedding bands. The little bottle of cologne was in there too, because Adam wanted to keep it safe from breakage, and it was the one place the younger boys were guaranteed to never touch.

Though he was as quiet as possible when he pulled the drawer open, the warped wood still scraped slightly against the frame. He didn't see the cologne at first, but knew it had to be somewhere among the piles of paper and familial possessions. As Crane reached into the back of the drawer, he felt something smooth, like foil, under his fingers, and instinctively pulled it out, thinking perhaps Adam had candy hidden in the drawer as well. When he brought the item to the light though, Crane felt his heart skip a beat, realizing what it was that he had just discovered in his brother's drawer.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Crane thought he might jump out of his skin as he slammed the drawer closed, shoving the condom in his back pocket and spinning away from the night stand. There was Brian, standing in the doorway with a smirk on his face, obviously amused at finding his typically well behaved brother going through other people's stuff.

Though Brian's question had been asked in good humor, Crane couldn't think of how to reply, too shocked by the discovery of a condom in Adam's drawer to speak. He had never actually held one before, but he knew exactly what it was from the little wrapper and circular outline inside. If it had been in Brian's drawer he might not have been so surprised, but he felt a strange sense of disappointment in Adam. Although he knew his brother had gone on a few dates in the past, he didn't think Adam was the kind of guy to sleep around.

"You all right?" Brian asked, moving to Crane's side and glancing at the drawer. He had a sudden knowing look on his face as he passed his brother and went right to his own bedside at the window. After shifting through the drawer a moment, he pulled out a small blue bottle and passed it over to Crane. "I take it that's what you were looking for?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess."

"Take mine. It's smells better than Adam's anyway." Brian was still joking, but Crane couldn't enjoy it.

Instead, he tried to act unfazed, taking the bottle from his brother and hoping his face wasn't too red. "Thanks Brian. I guess I should get changed."

"You better call Cathy and find out more about this party. Then take a shower. Girls don't want guys who smell like they've been working with cattle all day."

Crane nodded, but he didn't move from his spot. Part of him wanted to ask Brian about the condom, or at least put it back. He didn't think Adam would be pleased to learn that he had taken it, and he felt sick just knowing it was in his pocket.

"Look," Brian said, the teasing tone in his voice turning to one of empathy. "Go take a shower, and I'll find a clean shirt for you. Do you have any clean jeans in your room?"

"I don't know."

Something had come over Crane, Brian could tell, but he only shook his head. "All right, I'll find some for you." As Crane finally made a move to pass him, Brian held him back a moment. "Maybe you should shave too."

Crane scrunched up his face as he reached up to touch his sorry excuse for facial hair. Brian had not wanted to say anything to him about it, but his lack of beard, yet desperate attempt to grow one with the few whiskers he had, was actually starting to bother him.

"I'll show you how if you want me to." Brian couldn't exactly grow a full beard either, but he recalled his father showing him how to shave when he needed to, and figured it would be a good time to pass that knowledge along to his brother.

Though he looked embarrassed by the thought, Crane didn't bother to argue as he made his way toward the hall phone, bottle of cologne in hand.

The conversation with Cathy was short, but it went well. She was over the moon with excitement at the prospect of meeting up with him. She was getting a ride with a few of her girlfriends, but would meet him there. Crane suddenly felt a little bit uncomfortable with the thought of having his brother drive him, but he decided there was nothing he could do about that. He got the address from Cathy, then got off the phone as quickly as he could, before heading off to the shower. As he grabbed his towel from the bedroom, he noticed Daniel curled up in bed asleep, but he didn't think much of it, as he had bigger worries on his mind.

When Crane was through in the shower, Brian came in to help him shave. He had a brand new razor for him and everything, though Crane couldn't help but think that he would have an easier time if he didn't have someone sitting there watching him.

"Ladies like stubble," Brian told him as he worked the razor over his cheeks.

"But I won't have stubble if I shave."

"Sure you will. You shave it now, by the time you get around to kissing her you'll have that late night stubble growing back."

"Who said anything about kissing?"

"Well you didn't have to say it," Brian teased, "I kind of figured that's what you had on your mind."

Crane just shook his head, suddenly remembering that the pocket of his jeans, the pair that were still sitting on the floor at Brian's feet, held the stolen condom. Again, he considered telling Brian, but knew he would never be able to have _that_ conversation with him.

"I put a shirt on your bed for you," Brian told him a few minutes later. "There's a clean pair of jeans with them too, but I figured you could get your socks and underwear out yourself."

Crane laughed. "I appreciate that."

"Just try and be quiet, all right? Daniel's passed out in bed."

"I saw earlier. I guess football practice really took it out of him today."

"Yeah football," Brian said, "and the talk he had with Adam after."

Crane felt his stomach tighten, guessing what Brian meant by that comment. "What happened?"

Brian shook his head, maintaining the secretive code he always did when one of the boys was in trouble. "If Daniel wants you to know what happened he'll tell you." Of course, Brian knew Daniel would tell him. He told Crane everything, and it wouldn't have surprised Brian if Crane already knew what transpired in town. But he didn't want to ask that question, knowing it wouldn't be fair to put his brother in a position where he felt the need to lie.

Crane couldn't help but worry, though, because he knew nothing of Daniel's troubles, and couldn't imagine what had set Adam off. Lately it seemed that Daniel was up to no good more than he was well behaved, so much so that even Crane himself had warned his younger brother to stop messing around. Daniel had always been a little more stubborn, and quicker to act and regret the move later than he was to think things through. Still, Crane hated to see any of his brothers hurting, least of all his roommate.

He remained as quiet as possible upon his return to the bedroom, but the moment he realized that Daniel had already begun to stir, he tried to make his presence known, hoping his brother would wake up and speak to him.

From his bed, Daniel remained silent, watching a moment as Crane shuffled through his drawer for fresh clothing. He could tell from the towel around his brother's waist and the dampness of his hair that he just showered, but it seemed a strange time of day for Crane to bathe.

"Where are you going?" Daniel asked. When he saw the clean shirt on Crane's bed, he began to worry that everyone else had plans to leave the ranch.

"Nowhere right now," Crane promised, noting that he still had a few hours to kill. "There's a party in Murphys later tonight."

Daniel shot up in bed. "Can I come?"

"A high school party," the older boy added. "Sorry, kid. Maybe in a couple more years."

Crane tried to sound casual, but as a disappointed Daniel nodded his head in understanding, the older boy noticed his brother wince as he moved forward on the bed.

"What is it?" Crane asked, hoping Daniel wouldn't guess that he already knew the answer.

In return, Daniel flashed him a grin and carefully lay back down on his stomach.

"You don't have to worry. I just had a talk with big brother earlier, that's all."

"Adam?" Crane pretended to guess.

"Yeah, licked me real good."

Crane knew his brother was putting up a front for his sake, trying to sound proud and all, but it wasn't necessary. "Are you okay?"

"Sure, I'm all right." Daniel's smile faded though as his brother turned back to his dresser to change into a clean pair of jeans. "Hey Crane, did Adam or Brian ever whup you before?"

Crane remained quiet a while, trying to decide how to answer. Sure, both of his older brothers had given him a swat or two in the past, usually when his sarcastic mouth got the best of him, but he didn't think that was the answer Daniel was looking for. There had only been one time, when Crane was thirteen, that Adam had really laid into him, but he wasn't so sure he wanted to tell Daniel about it. Instead, he tried to skirt around the question. "Dad gave me a few when I was younger."

"Did he ever use his belt?"

Crane spun around to face his little brother, stunned by the question. "Adam whipped you?"

"Yeah."

"What'd you do, Daniel?" In a flash, Crane moved to his brother's side and sat on the floor next to his bed. Though the boy didn't look particularly wounded, the fact that he was wearing his usual jeans and t-shirt made it hard to tell.

Daniel decided to tell Crane most of the story anyway, from taking the eggs, to getting caught throwing them at Pete's truck. He left out the part about Ford's involvement, and the fact that he'd cried like a baby after Adam punished him for fear that Crane would think less of him for both. As it turned out, his brother was none-too-pleased with anything he learned, despite the fact that he had a whole bunch of chores coming too.

"I guess if anyone deserved that belt it was you. What made you think it would be okay to do something like this?"

Daniel buried his face in his comforter and sighed, thinking it a bad idea to admit that he thought it sounded like fun. Crane worried from his own harsh tone that he had upset his brother more, and he knew it wasn't really his place to judge.

"Are you okay?" He placed a gentle hand on Daniel's back, worried he'd broken their line of trust already.

"I'm fine." As Daniel turned over to his side he explained, "After Adam talked to me and told me why it was wrong to act this way, I was kind of glad he licked me. At least I know he doesn't hate me."

"Nobody could hate you."

Propping himself up on one elbow, Daniel shot Crane a smile. "You never answered my question earlier. Did Dad ever use his belt?"

"Once," Crane said with a slight nod. "But it wasn't like the way he gave it to Adam and Brian."

"Why was it different?"

"It's hard to explain. I don't know how much you remember about the way Dad punished us, but when Brian and Adam and I were kids it was sort of a big deal when we got in trouble. With Mom, she would swat us every once and a while when she thought we were getting out of line, but it was mostly while we walked by or if we were getting mouthy. Dad never lost his temper the same way. He used to send us upstairs or outside, and he would talk to us a good long time before he did anything."

"That's how Adam is now," Daniel said. "And Brian."

"Yes, but they're kind of like Mom too. So one time, when I was I guess nine, Dad warned all of us boys not to go near the creek because they thought the water was contaminated and he didn't want us to get hurt. But Brian wanted to go there anyway, and the two of us sneaked off after chores so we could see for ourselves what all the fuss was about. When we came home it was well after dark, and when we saw Dad standing on the front porch waiting for us, Brian told me to hide out so that he could take the rap for me. I waited a long time for him to come back, and then I started to worry that he forgot about me. I decided to go back to the house and face everybody myself. Just as I came around the side of the barn, Dad and Brian were stepping outside, and when Dad realized that I had been with Brian, he twisted me around and gave me two hard licks with his belt."

"Did it hurt?"

"Like hell," Crane admitted, "but I felt bad too because I knew that he usually gave it to Adam and Brian on their bare skin. I didn't mind taking those hits though, because it was better than watching Dad turn around and give Brian another five just for bringing me down to the creek with him."

"Was Brian mad at you?"

"No. He actually apologized to me later for dragging me into it, but I still felt bad. Then I heard Mom and Dad get into an argument, because she said I was too young for that kind of punishment. I even heard Dad tell her that he felt sorry for losing his temper, but he never said anything about that to me."

"I'm sorry, Crane," Daniel said, thinking his brother was still upset about the event after all these years.

When Crane felt a hand on his shoulder he had to laugh. "It's all right. Dad and I had a few years of good memories after that, don't worry."

As he stood up from the bed and turned away from his brother, Crane decided he couldn't leave Daniel like this, not when he knew he was putting up a brave front. He didn't want his brother to be alone all night, and knowing Daniel, the kid would probably try and hide his face from the rest of the family. Deciding it best to stay home and keep Daniel company, Crane resolved to call Cathy after supper and let her know that he changed his mind about going to the party.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks again to everyone who read and reviewed! Enjoy!

Chapter Five

Though Brian had offered to help Adam cook supper that night, the oldest McFadden brother thought it would be a good idea to prepare the meal himself. He hoped it might keep him busy and give him a chance to think over how he was going to proceed with the upcoming conversations that evening. But the stew was already in the oven and his mind was numb, the only semblance of feeling in his body being that of the terrible feeling in his stomach.

As he stirred the meal in the roasting pan and placed it back in the oven, Adam thought it might be a good idea to step outside for a few minutes and breathe in some of the crisp, late afternoon air. Still, it did nothing to clear his head, and all he could think of was how much he hated what he'd done to Daniel earlier. In that moment though, he had thought it was the best course of action, especially for a boy who'd been such a handful lately. Part of Adam believed that this harsher punishment would help his brother realize that he was pressing his luck in more ways than one, but Adam never would have been that drastic if he had known Ford was involved.

If Daniel was a sensitive kid, then Ford was a walking water fountain. The child felt everything with a level of depth that even Adam didn't understand. The slightest look of disappointment or word of warning was often enough to bring tears to Ford's eyes, and Adam knew that corporal punishment was only to be used under the most drastic circumstances for Ford. Sure, the boy deserved to be punished this time, but he was little, and he wasn't accustomed to causing trouble the way Daniel was.

Now it was up to Adam to make the tough decisions. Did he punish Ford the same way he punished Daniel, and risk doling out something the younger boy wasn't yet ready to receive, or did he give Ford a different punishment for the same crime committed by his older brother? In a way, Adam wondered if it would be good for Daniel to learn that by taking Ford along on his adventures, it meant he was partially responsible for his brother's troubles. The problem, though, was that no matter what he decided, Adam was still the one who had to hand out the punishment. No matter how hard it was for Daniel to accept responsibility, it would be a hundred times harder for Adam to be the one to teach him that lesson.

Walking along the porch and finally taking a seat on the rocker outside the front door in order to contemplate the issue further, Adam looked out across the lawn to where his youngest three brothers were playing in the hay outside the barn. Evan was busy chasing Ford and Guthrie in the little yard, while Brian worked on the tractor nearby, secretly supervising the actions of the boys.

While Adam watched them, he wondered how Ford could possibly be involved with the stunts in town, especially when he was running around now as though he didn't have a care in the world. He couldn't understand how someone like Ford, who was typically so concerned with others, could take part in something so terrible. No, that wasn't quite true, he knew why Ford had done it, probably because he wanted to fit in, but that bothered Adam even more. Not that the boy had succumb to pressure from other kids. He could handle that. It was the fact that even Ford was old enough now to have to face those sorts of problems.

It was times like this that hit Adam the hardest, when he realized how quickly life seemed to change. One minute, Ford was excited because he could finally tie his shoes without help, and then suddenly, he was insisting that he didn't need help with his homework anymore, that he was too big for that sort of thing. It wasn't just Ford either, it was all of them.

Even Brian, who was just a little more than a year younger than Adam, was growing up to fast for his liking. He was off on a date at least one Saturday a month, which didn't sound like much, but around their house, it was a blessing. Sometimes, Adam was even a little glad that Brian didn't take any of the girls he took out too seriously. Not that he wanted his brother mistreating anyone, but he was always relieved to know that Brian wasn't looking to settle down. At twenty, it wouldn't have been unheard of for Brian to go looking for a relationship of sorts, and a small part of Adam, one that had never even said the words out loud, worried that one day, Brian might up and leave him with five little brothers to care for all on his own.

He knew it was silly to think that way. Brian would never do that to him, and it was his own insecurities showing through, which is why Adam kept thoughts like that to himself. For all his worries about everyone growing up too fast, he was glad that his brothers were able to help more around the farm as they aged. They were a strong bunch of boys, and capable of more than many other kids their age. Adam never asked too much from them, but he was glad to have them all healthy just the same.

As he sat there quietly, feeling as though he might have too much weight on his shoulders for one night, Adam watched as Evan slipped away from the other two boys and raced over to Brian's side. They seemed to whisper something to each other, and glanced back at the house a few times, before Brian finally gave Evan a small, encouraging push in Adam's direction.

Adam watched, curious, as Evan made his way across the yard and up the front path. He was surprised when his typically bold brother hesitated at the bottom of the porch stairs, a nervous look on his face, but for the life of him Adam couldn't figure out what was wrong. He knew for a fact that Evan had not been involved with the egging incident, and there was no way Evan even knew about Daniel's punishment, not when Adam and Brian had decided to keep quiet about it.

"Something on your mind?" Adam asked, surprised by the irritated tone in his own voice. It wasn't Evan's fault that he was frustrated, and he caught the pained look on his brother's face at the sound of his curt question.

Remaining still at the bottom of the stairs, Evan shrugged.

Despite his regret at being short with the boy, Adam couldn't help it when he asked, "Well, what is it?"

Slowly, Evan climbed the stairs, keeping a careful eye on his brother as he moved. When he finally reached the top, he made sure to keep out of arm's reach as he took a deep breath and stated, "I didn't do anything wrong."

"Who says you did?"

"You."

Confused by Evan's defensive tone, Adam leaned forward and cocked an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"This morning," Evan reminded him. "You told me you wanted to talk to me about my chores, but then you went to town."

Adam vaguely recalled this moment, but after what happened with Daniel, he hadn't given it any thought. "That was hours ago."

Evan's face twisted with confused anger, frustrated to think that Adam had snapped at him earlier for no reason. He ground a sneakered heel into the porch floorboard. "You said not to go anywhere, Adam. You were mad at me."

"Evan, I-"

"Crane said it's because you think I didn't bring in the eggs this morning. But I did, Adam, I brought them all in without being told because I didn't want you to think I was too lazy to remember to do my chores."

Between his troubles with Daniel, and his concerns for what would happen to Ford, Adam suddenly remembered the stern warning he had given Evan earlier, and it was all too much for him to handle. Recognizing now that he had flown off the handle at Evan and accused him of skipping out on chores without even giving the boy a chance to explain, Adam felt terrible. He could only imagine how awful it was for his brother to wait around all day, thinking he was in trouble, when in fact the eggs had been stolen. In one quick motion, he leaned forward in his seat and took hold of Evan's hand, pulling the boy toward him.

"I'm so sorry, buddy." Adam then wrapped his arms around his brother, holding him close as he sat back in the rocking chair. "I made a mistake yelling at you this morning."

Evan didn't say anything, and stood rigid, neither fighting nor accepting the comfort of Adam's embrace.

"I never should have done that." Adam said. "I should have talked to you first, and I shouldn't have forgotten to come find you when I got home."

From beneath Adam's grip, Evan gave a slight shrug, not yet prepared to accept the apology.

"You must have had a pretty crummy Saturday," Adam guessed, as he leaned back far enough to look the boy in the eye. "It must not have been fun spending the whole day thinking I was mad at you."

"I didn't do anything wrong," Evan said again, his voice weak. He was afraid to admit to his brother the he was a little angry with him. It seemed as though Adam genuinely felt bad about things, and Evan knew better than to hold a grudge just for the sake of being spiteful.

"I made a mistake, Evan, and I'm really sorry about that." Adam kissed the top of Evan's head, before standing back up and guiding the boy toward the stairs. "I know you've been working really hard to get your chores done without warning too. I guess I can't make it right, but how would you like to stay up for an extra hour tonight? We can play a game together, or do whatever you like."

A gap-toothed smiled cracked on Evan's face then, and he made no attempt to hide his excitement. "Just you and me? Really?"

"Sure," Adam said. "If that's what you want."

When Evan squeezed his arms around Adam's waist a moment later, the older brother took it to mean that he was accepting the offer of a later bedtime. Secretly, Adam was relieved to have resolved the conflict so easily, because he knew that slighting Evan could have led to a very grumpy eleven-year-old, and the last thing he needed was another angsty kid around the farm.

In good spirits again, Evan asked, "Will supper be ready soon? I'm going to be starving in a little while."

Adam thought it was funny that his brother always knew what time he might start to get hungry, but he didn't say so out loud for risk of hurting the boy's feelings. Instead, he motioned toward their brothers outside the barn. "Why don't you go and tell those guys to come inside and wash up. I'll get Daniel and Crane. By the time we have everyone in and the table set, supper should be ready."

Without another word to Adam, Evan took off running toward the barn, shouting to the others that it was time to come in and eat. He said nothing about getting cleaned up first, but Adam knew Brian would take care of that. He knew he only had a finite amount of time to get Crane and Daniel downstairs before there was some sort of riot in the kitchen, and so he quickly checked supper one last time before heading upstairs to fetch his brothers.

Part of him was nervous about the prospect of facing Daniel. They were still on speaking terms, of course, but Adam always felt a secret guilt when he spoke to his brothers after a punishment. Upon his arrival upstairs though, Adam realized that the one he needed to watch out for was Crane, who had always been Daniel's protector. Though Crane was the brother who consistently showed Adam the most respect, there was often an awkwardness in the air when Crane felt the need to defend his younger brother against one of the older two.

Adam stood in the hallway outside his brothers' room a minute, staring at the closed door and wondering if he should knock and risk waking Daniel, or just wait for Crane to step outside. He heard voices talking softly inside, though, and finally decided it best to face them right away. As he knocked, Crane called for him to come inside, but when Adam pushed the door open, he was surprised to see Crane's face turn red as he turned away to face his dresser.

"Hey," Adam said, surprised at how shy he sounded. He glanced over at Daniel, laying sideways on his bed, and wondered if his brother was still feeling any pain. All thoughts of disappointment he had in Daniel for involving for in his trouble disappeared as he said, "Supper's just about ready. Why don't you two come downstairs?"

"Sounds good to me," Daniel said, smiling as he pulled himself out of bed.

As he darted across the room, Adam caught the boy in the doorway and held him back a moment to look him over.

"Are you all right?" Adam asked quietly, needing to know that there was no permanent damage between the two of them. "How are you feeling?"

Daniel thought a moment, then admitted, "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse."

Though relieved that Daniel was in good spirits, Adam couldn't help but notice the way Crane hesitated to leave the room as Daniel disappeared down the stairs. The teen stood facing the window with his back to his older brother still. He was dressed in his clean jeans and t-shirt, and Adam could see that there was a freshly ironed blue plaid shirt on the bed. It was Adam's shirt, but he wasn't going to ask Crane where he got it, not when he guessed his brother was probably already nervous about the night ahead.

"Brian tells me you're going to a party tonight," Adam said, his voice awkward as he was unsure of why Crane would be so distant toward him. "It's your first party. Are you looking forward to it?"

Still refusing to look at his brother, Crane said, "I don't think I'm going anymore."

Adam straightened up tall in the doorway. "Why not?"

"I want to stay here."

Taking a step toward the teen, Adam reached for his shoulder, turning him just enough for his brother to have to look at him. He tried to remain impartial as he asked, "Care to tell me why?"

"I think I'll stay home with Daniel instead." Crane tried to shrug it off as though missing the party was no big deal, but Adam wouldn't stand for it.

"Listen to me," Adam said, hardening his voice just a little. "I take it Daniel told you what happened today, and you have every right to feel concerned for him, but you can't punish yourself because he did something wrong."

"I'm not punishing myself." Crane twisted free of Adam's grip and though he turned fully toward him now, he refused to look him in the eye. "It's no big deal."

"It is too a big deal." It frustrated Adam that Crane was refusing to look at him, as though he was some terrible monster when he was only trying to do his job as a parent. "You're going to that party tonight."

"What if I just don't feel like it?"

"Then you can stay home," Adam conceded, "but you won't be spending any time with Daniel while you're here. It's your choice if you want to stay back, but from what Brian told me it sounds like there's a girl who is looking forward to seeing you there. You know better than to let someone down like that."

For a moment Crane wasn't sure if he wanted to cry or punch his brother, but he knew Adam was right. There was no sense in wasting his own time and everyone else's by wallowing at home with Daniel. He still refused to look at his brother, unable to face him after what he'd found in his night stand.

"All right," Crane said, trying to walk away. "I'll go, but I need to make a phone call first."

"Take your time." Adam was confused by his brother's cold shoulder, and couldn't shake the feeling that he'd done something wrong. But he left him alone upstairs to make his phone call in peace.

Crane waited in the hall until his older brother disappeared down the stairs. He felt ashamed of the way he had just spoken to him, but he was too embarrassed, and too scared, to look at his brother after taking the condom from his dresser. Crane still hadn't pulled the package out of his old jeans, and though he'd tried to do it with Daniel in the room, he was nervous that his younger brother would see and ask questions.

Now that he was alone, Crane quickly slipped back into his room and retrieved the foil packet from his jeans and slipped it into the pocket of his clean pants, hoping to take it into Adam's room when he returned Brian's cologne. He just hoped he would have a chance to go in without being seen, or else he risked having a very uncomfortable conversation with his oldest brother.

Stopping in the hall a minute to make his phone call, Crane then headed downstairs, to the noise of his younger brothers setting the table. He could smell the stew cooking in the kitchen and wanted nothing more than to grab something to eat, but he needed to talk to Brian first. He found him busy switching over a load of laundry in the small alcove off the kitchen.

"Do you think you can drive me earlier?" Crane asked, eager to leave the house. "Some of the guys are going to meet up before the party and hang out for a while. Jeff said he would drive me over to the party with him."

Brian nodded as he listened, and while he was happy to oblige his brother's request, he wanted to put up a more parental front for a moment first. "Are you meeting at Jeff's house?"

"Yeah, he said I could come by any time after supper."

"Are they going to be drinking at his place before the party?"

"I – I don't think so."

"All right," Brian said with a nod, tossing a handful of dishtowels into the dryer, "I'll take you to Jeff's and you can go with the rest of them, but if anyone starts to drink ahead of time, I want you to call me. Okay?"

Crane, who was typically level headed and practical, hesitated a moment. "You want me to rat on my friends?"

"No. I want you to remember that you don't get into a car with people who've been drinking. Call me if you have to and I'll drive you guys over to your party."

"Brian, that's a lot of trips into town for one day."

"I don't care." Brian closed the dryer with just enough force to make his younger brother jump. He turned, and placed a finger on Crane's chest. "You call me, got it?"

Grateful that Brian wasn't making a huge deal out of this the way he was sure Adam would, Crane nodded, and quietly agreed, "Yeah, okay."

Part of Crane wanted to tell Brian right then why he was so desperate to get out of the house, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. The only reason he called Jeff was because he wanted to get away from Adam. Crane didn't know why he was upset with his brother, but finding the condoms made him confused, and he needed a chance to think without the rest of his family around. He was nervous about the party too, and thought spending some time with his buddies, and not his little brothers, would help him gear up for the evening.

There was noticeable tension throughout supper that night. Adam was consumed with his own guilt over Daniel and his worry that Crane was mad at him, while Brian had begun to suspect there was a problem with Crane, who couldn't look anyone in the eye throughout supper. Ford had noticed the uncomfortable way in which Daniel sat through the meal, and as his own worries about trouble overcame him, he struggled to make eye contact with the darker haired boy all night. Daniel refused to glance across the table at Ford though, afraid that he might give away his secret. Things were easier for Evan and Guthrie, who had no troubles of their own, but when Evan caught on to the awkward air in the room, even he grew quiet, allowing Guthrie to do most of the chatting in their cross table conversation.

After supper, Crane was excused from clean up duty so he could put on his clean over shirt for the party, and he was annoyed when Ford followed him up the stairs. He needed to get into Adam and Brian's room alone if he was ever going to put the condom away, but he didn't dare risk such a thing with Ford watching him.

Ford, for his part, had gone to Crane after Daniel continued to ignore him. He knew that if Daniel had spoken to anyone about being in trouble, it would have been Crane, and Ford guessed Crane was probably the safest person to ask about it without putting himself on the line at the same time.

"Hey Crane?" Ford asked, standing timidly in the doorway as his brother buttoned up a clean shirt. "Is Daniel in some kind of trouble?"

Crane eyed Ford suspiciously a moment, thinking it was a strange question. Already annoyed with his brother for intruding on his chance to get into Adam's room alone, Crane shrugged, glancing over his shoulder as he replied, "Who wants to know?"

"Me."

"Did Daniel say anything to you about it?"

"No, but I thought-"

"Maybe you're better off minding your own business." Crane didn't mean to sound malicious, but he didn't leave Ford room to question him. In the end, the younger boy was left upstairs alone, while Crane went down to find Brian, the cologne still sitting on his dresser, the condom still burning a hole in his pocket.

As the other boys cleaned the kitchen, Brian pulled Adam outside a moment to talk about their dilemma. "Any idea what you're going to do with Ford yet?"

"No," Adam admitted, "but I know I have to talk to him soon. I can't think straight and know I'll probably make everyone crazy if I put it off much longer."

"Can you wait until I get back from driving Crane to town? I'm only going into Murphys, and you're going to need my help."

Adam rolled his eyes. "I think I can handle Ford."

"That's not what I mean." Though they already spoke in low voices, Brian quieted his to a whisper. "I'm worried about what Dan'l might do once he realizes that Ford is in trouble too. He obviously cared enough to keep this from us, so he's probably not going to react well when he learns that Ford is in for it."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Despite his words, and his knowledge that they were true, Adam hated to think that he couldn't handle a couple of kids. Still, the last thing he needed was for their evening to get out of hand, so he agreed to wait until Brian got back. In the meantime, he would try and figure out a conclusive plan for what to do about Ford.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Once again, thank you so much for reading and reviewing! Please enjoy!

Chapter Six

Crane didn't feel much different than normal in Adam's button down shirt, but it still felt nice when Brian told him that he looked good as they climbed into the truck to leave.

"You smell all right too," Brian teased. "Aren't you glad you didn't use Adam's cologne?"

All Crane could do was blush at that, knowing how close Brian had come to catching him with the condom in his hand. Still, he enjoyed the compliment all the same. Appearances didn't mean anything to Crane, but with Cathy involved now, he wanted to look just a little better than his Monday to Friday school self. As much as he looked forward to the party, though, he was nervous about leaving the others for an entire night. For once, he would be the only brother out of the house, and he wasn't sure whether to feel special or guilty for it.

"Just try to have fun," Brian advised as they took the back road away from their ranch. "As long as you don't leave the party without calling me first, and you don't completely lose your head, you'll have a great time."

Brian couldn't help but shake his head as he looked over at his brother, who was obviously terrified. As much as he wanted to tell Crane that he knew how he felt, Brian had no idea what it was like to be scared of a party. He remembered his first time without any adult supervision, and he'd been thrilled. Never once had he worried about letting anyone down or disappointing them. Part of him wondered if that was just Crane's personality, or if it was the effect of too much responsibility on his young shoulders.

"You'll be fine," Brian reassured him, when Crane failed to say anything in reply.

"Yeah, but what about you guys?" Crane nervously rubbed at the now smooth skin of his jawline and stared out the window. "Maybe it's a bad idea for me to leave everyone tonight."

" _Everyone_?" Brian asked. "Or Daniel?"

"Both, I guess."

"Don't worry about us. Dan'l will be fine. Heck, you saw him after supper. He's already in a good mood again."

"I hate it when he's in trouble."

"I hate it when any of you are in trouble," Brian joked, "but we always get through it." He decided it would be a good idea to keep quiet about the trouble Daniel was going to be in when Adam confronted him about bringing Ford along on his egging adventures. Crane didn't need anything to worry about, and despite his close ties with their dark haired little brother, this was none of his business.

For a while, the only noise in the truck was that of static coming through the radio, but Brian soon grew tired of the uncomfortable manner in which Crane fidgeted in his seat. He gave a low whistle and shook his head. "You don't have anything to worry about tonight."

"With Daniel?"

"No," Brian laughed, "with the party. Look, I'm willing to bet you that after a few minutes you'll be praying the darned thing never ends."

"I don't even know what I'm supposed to do there."

"Just hang out with your friends." Brian wasn't exactly sure how to explain to his brother that the fun would find him. It always did, especially when high schoolers were involved. He worried though, that one of two things was about to happen that night, that no one wanted. Either Crane would spend the entire night miserable and refuse to go to any future parties, or he would completely let loose and go wild. While Brian knew it was unlikely, he decided it might be a good idea to have a little chat with his brother about expectations for the night. "Uh, listen Crane, I know I don't have to tell you this, but just humor me, all right? Big brother would kill me if he thought I didn't say something."

Crane shifted awkwardly in his seat, refusing to look at his brother. "What is it?"

"Just, don't do any drugs, okay? There will probably be pot there, but don't smoke it."

"I would never do drugs, Brian." Crane tried not to sound hurt by the warning, but Brian could tell he was.

"I know you're a smart kid, brother, but you have to understand that sometimes, when you're in a new situation, things can happen quickly or get out of control. I don't know if you've ever seen a joint or anything like that before, but if someone pulls one out, remember that you can always walk away. Go hang out with someone else, or do something else. No one's going to judge you if you don't try it."

Crane wasn't sure what to say, and he was almost embarrassed that Brian thought him too young to figure that stuff out on his own. So, he nodded in silence, and hoped that Brian would take that as a promise to steer clear of anything bad.

Despite his warning about drugs, Brian was careful not to mention alcohol. There were many things he didn't want any of his brothers getting mixed up in, but he couldn't pretend that he felt the same way about beer. He knew Crane probably wouldn't touch a drink, that he wouldn't even consider it, but Brian didn't want to forbit it. If the kid did decide to have a beer or two, he didn't want him feeling guilty about it. He wanted his brother, who was by all accounts the most well behaved son in the entire McFadden family, to have his chance to mess up like other kids, or at the very least enjoy one night of stupidity.

What Brian didn't realize, though, was that thoughts of alcohol had yet to cross Crane's mind. In all his fears about how to act around Cathy at the party, it never even occurred to him that people might be drinking. At that moment, he was still too worried about the contents of his pocket to take Brian's warning about drugs to heart. Embarrassed as he was about the condom though, he knew he wouldn't be able to enjoy the party until he talked at least some of what was going through his mind with Brian. As he struggled to find a way to casually slip it into conversation though, he shifted in his seat, and, with his hand pressed against his leg, the foil wrapper made a crinkling sound from inside his pocket.

"What was that?" Brian asked, noticing the way Crane tried to cover up the noise by shifting again.

"Nothing."

For a moment, the notion that Crane might actually have drugs on him began to worry Brian. He realized the boy had been acting strange all day, and Brian honestly began to fear the worst when he said as nicely as possible, "Come on, Crane. You can tell me."

"Brian," Crane said, almost in a whine, "I don't want you to get mad at me."

"So don't hide stuff from me."

Crane's face must have flushed twenty-five shades of red before he tried to bury it in his hands. "It's too embarrassing."

More concerned than ever about this little situation, and not feeling like spending the entire ride trying to drag the information out of his brother, Brian replied by simply stating, "I don't care. You can always tell me what's going on."

But Crane couldn't find the words to explain himself, so he finally twisted in his seat, and reached into his pocket to pull out the little package. He kept it in his hand, half covering the silver wrapper, but Brian only needed a quick glance to recognize what it was.

He sucked in a breath, keeping the truck steady down the road as he tried to process the situation. Okay, so his younger brother had a condom. He was going to a party to meet a girl. It just proved that he was trying to be responsible. What surprised Brian was that he'd never realized Crane was this advanced. Sure, he knew the kid was already interested in girls, but fifteen seemed too young to be headed in the direction Crane was ready to go.

"Where did you get it?" Brian finally asked, thinking his brother must have purchased it from the drug store or something. The moment the thought crossed his mind, Brian knew it couldn't be true. Crane wouldn't have had the nerve to go into the store in Murphys and ask for them, and Brian doubted that he was making secret trips out of town just to shop for condoms.

When Crane finally gave a muffled answer, Brian had to ask him to repeat himself. "You want to try that again? Where did you get it?"

"Your room."

For a second Brian wondered how that was possible, since he knew for a fact that he didn't have any. That's when he remembered catching Crane snooping through Adam's drawer earlier that day. Though it was obvious the teen was embarrassed about it, Brian wasn't.

"You stole it from Adam's dresser?"

Crane hesitated to come up with an explanation, and looked as though he would rather be any other place in the world right then. "It's not – I didn't mean to."

"If you're thinking of having sex, why didn't you come talk to one of us?" The moment the words escaped his lips, Brian realized how ridiculous they sounded. If Crane couldn't tell him about the condom, how could he possibly ask them about sex? "I'll tell you one thing, if you're too embarrassed to talk about needing a condom, you'll be way more embarrassed if you have to go into the store to buy diapers."

Brian knew from experience how awkward it could be, even growing up in a town as small as Murphys where he should have known everyone, to walk up to the counter of the store with diapers in hand. Their mother had always used the washable kind, but after she passed away, Adam decided it would be easier, and less messy, to put Guthrie in disposable ones until he outgrew them. Poor Brian though, at sixteen, often found himself at the store to do the shopping, getting disapproving looks from strangers, as though they thought the diapers were for his kid. Well, he wasn't about to let Crane go through that, not if he could help it.

"It's not like that." Crane sounded like he was on the verge of tears, and his head hung so low it was hard to hear most of what he said. "I didn't take it for me."

Brian raised an eyebrow, surprised by how hopeful he was that this was true. "So, you took it for a friend?"

"No. I didn't mean to take it at all."

"Of all the excuses you can give, that's what you come up with?"

"I was looking for cologne in Adam's stuff, and I found the condom by mistake. You came into the room and I thought you might get mad at me if you saw it. I was going to put it back after, but I didn't have the chance."

Brian thought this over a moment, and though it seemed like a strange situation, he knew Crane wasn't one to tell lies. Besides, the kid seemed so ashamed of himself that Brian guessed it was probably true. "I wouldn't be mad at you, even if you did take it for yourself. I would rather you be safe than sorry when it comes to-"

"Oh, please stop!" Crane threw his head back in exasperation. He'd already seen the slides in health class, and didn't need his brother reminding him of them. "I don't want to have this conversation with you."

"Tough," Brian said, though he actually found it a little funny. He was, however, glad that he was the one to have this chat with Crane, and not Adam, who was often so worried about saying the wrong thing that he stumbled over his words and became tongue tied. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about."

"How can you say that? I never would have gone through Adam's stuff if I thought it was in there."

"To be fair, I'm sure he wouldn't have left it in the drawer if he thought you were going look to in there."

"It's not funny, Brian."

"Calm down. It's no big deal."

"Yes it is." Crane couldn't understand how his brother was being so cool about things. All Crane had done that afternoon was stress out about it, and here was Brian, acting as though he wasn't even shocked to learn that Adam kept condoms in his dresser. "What does he need them for anyway? I mean, I wouldn't have been surprised to find it in your drawer, but Adam's?"

A sudden silence overcame the air in the truck as Crane realized the thoughtlessness in his words, and as he dared glance at his brother, he noticed that Brian's face seemed to have paled. A moment later, when Brian flicked off the radio and pulled the car over to the side of the road, Crane wanted to do nothing more than crawl into a hole and die.

"I'm sorry, Brian."

"I'm not mad," Brian said, though the glower on his face said otherwise. "I just want to clear something up. What I do in my personal time is my business. Not yours. Not Adam's. Certainly not the town of Murphys. If you have questions for me, you can always come to me, and I will always answer as honestly as I can. Just because you _think_ I have a reputation, doesn't mean I've gone out of my way to earn it. Whatever you've heard about me from your friends or people in town, you can just forget."

"I didn't mean-"

"The same goes for Adam. Just because you think he's perfect doesn't mean he is, and just because he had a condom in his drawer, that he might or might not use, it's none of your business."

"I know that."

"Good," Brian said, trying to ignore the way Crane's lower lip quivered. "If you are worried about the way Adam and I conduct ourselves, you can always come talk to us. But don't make assumptions about us based on something you find while going through other people's belongings."

"I'm sorry."

Brian let the threatening tone in his voice hang a moment, before finally smiling, and giving his brother a playful punch to the shoulder. "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

"Can I ask you something then?"

Knowing he was probably going to regret the offer, Brian stood strong. "Shoot."

"Well, I know you said not to make assumptions, but I can't help it. Why would Adam have these? He doesn't go out that often, and the only girls I've ever met aren't exactly – well, they don't seem like the kind of girls to give it up on the first date."

Brian couldn't help but laugh at the question, knowing that Crane had a thing or two to learn about girls. The first thing, though, was that he needed to watch his mouth. "Don't let Adam hear you talking like that, okay? I know you don't mean to sound rude, but he would probably take it the wrong way."

"I know. I guess he'd be pretty embarrassed if he found out I took it from his drawer too, huh?"

"Don't be so sure of that. You may as well keep the one you found though, just in case you need it some time."

"I can't hang on to this." As if needing to prove it, Crane tossed the condom on the dashboard in disgust. "Where would I put it? Daniel might find it. Besides, I don't need it, and Adam will probably want it back."

Knowing it wasn't his place to speak for Adam, Brian didn't know how to tell Crane that it was unlikely Adam would ever notice it missing. It would have been too difficult to explain that Adam held on to those condoms just in case, because he didn't want to get someone pregnant when they already had a full house. Even if Adam noticed it missing, he would assume Brian had taken it. It wasn't something the older two ever discussed with each other, but that didn't mean Brian wanted Crane to feel like he couldn't come to them if he had a problem.

Though Brian realized his younger brother was on the cusp of manhood, he wasn't sure he was prepared to let this conversation go any further. How could he tell a fifteen-year-old who'd never even gone out with a girl that sometimes when two people got together, even when they weren't planning on doing anything, they sometimes let their bodies to the thinking for a while? That wasn't a discussion he wanted to have for couple years yet, and if Brian was uncomfortable with it, he knew Crane would have been mortified. For now, he wanted his brother to know that it wasn't fair to judge them.

"Look," Brian assured is brother, "if Adam says anything, I'll tell him I took it. Keep it someplace you know Daniel will never see, or get rid of it if you want. Just don't tell Adam about it, all right? I don't think he's ready to have that talk with any of you guys yet."

Crane could only manage a nod of the head, before he felt a tear slip down his cheek. He never meant to offend Brian, and felt stupid for his careless words. "I should just go home," he whispered. "I shouldn't go to the party."

"Oh no you don't," Brian laughed, putting the truck in gear again. "Adam warned me that you were trying to get out of going. Wipe your face and maybe your eyes will be dry by the time we get to Jeff's house."

Crane shook his head as he glared at Brian. "I must be the only guy on the planet whose brothers are forcing him to go to a party."

Brian nodded, "Then I guess that means you're the luckiest guy on the planet too."


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: As always, thanks again for reading and reviewing! I know lots of you have been looking forward to Adam's conversation with Daniel and Ford, and now we're going to start getting into that. Enjoy!

Chapter Seven

Adam's willingness to wait for Brian's return home worked out for the best. He was having one of his rough nights with Guthrie, trying to remain jovial for the little boy's sake, while at his wit's end as he attempted to get the child ready for bed. Guthrie could take his sweet time on a good day, but on a bad day it was all but impossible to get him into the tub and washed up before the weather turned cold.

They always struggled to convince the boy to take a bath, but the real trouble came when they tried to get him out, dried off, and into his pajamas. Ever since Guthrie realized that his oldest brothers slept mostly in their boxers, he wanted to do the same, and most of the time Adam allowed it. With winter on it's way now, though, Adam didn't want to risk the boy getting sick, and by the time he finally got the dirty blond scamp into his Bugs Bunny PJs, the child was bouncing off the wall with excitement.

"It's Halloween tomorrow, right?" Guthrie asked, running circles around Adam as they made their way toward the bedroom. "Are we still going trick or treating?"

"As long as you're on your best behavior," Adam said, hoping the slight warning in his voice would help move his brother along. With Halloween falling on a Sunday that year, they didn't have the usual struggle of piecing costumes together at the last minute, but Adam knew that waiting all day Saturday _and_ Sunday, an entire weekend since their school party to finally go out and get candy, was a struggle for all young children. Especially Guthrie.

"Adam?"

"Yes?"

"Can we go trick or treating in Angels Camp?"

Adam tugged at his brother's arm, pulling him into the large bedroom at the end of the hall. "Why do you want to go there?"

"Because Evan said that's where they give out the full size candy bars."

"And just how would Evan know this? He's never been trick or treating anyplace but Murphys before."

"I'm not sure," Guthrie said, tilting his head to the side as a mass of straight hair tilted toward his shoulders. "He just knows, I guess."

"We'll go to Murphys," Adam said with finality, "same as we always do."

Getting Guthrie into bed was an adventure in itself. Sleeping arrangements in the McFadden house had changed over time. When their parents first passed away, Guthrie was still sleeping in his crib in their room, while the three oldest boys shared one room, and Daniel, Evan, and Ford shared the other. In the days leading up to the funeral though, when they were terrified of being split apart, Adam and Brian worried about leaving the boys alone at night, so they split up the rooms. Adam and Crane remained in theirs, and Daniel joined them, while Brian moved into the younger boy's bedroom. He took Guthrie with him, since he seemed to be the only one who could get the toddler to calm down and sleep at night.

For almost a year they kept up this arrangement, leaving their parents' room untouched for fear that they might spoil their memory. Eventually though, it seemed foolish to shove seven boys into two bedrooms when there was a perfectly good third one available, so Adam and Brian moved in there. They decided to keep Crane and Daniel together, since they were so close anyway, and Evan and Ford had always been roommates, so it made sense to keep them in the bunk bed in the smallest bedroom.

Guthrie was the wild card though, and for the first little while Adam let him sleep wherever he wanted. Usually it was with Ford, since he was the next in line for bed time, but sometimes he wound up in random places around the house. Those were the times that worried the oldest two brothers. In the middle of each night, one of them did a bed check to make sure everyone was okay, that no one was in distress from the common nightmares and insecurities that plagued them over the first couple years after their parents died. Soon, they began noticing that Guthrie was asleep on the living room sofa, or curled up on one of the dining room chairs. It took them a while to figure out why he ended up there, but finally they noticed that their baby brother had a tendency to wander around after everyone else was in bed.

Over time, Brian was the one who decided that if he and Adam ever hoped to get a good night's sleep again, they were going to have to bring Guthrie in with them. Since Brian's bed was next to the window, and Adam was in the middle of the room, they placed a rollaway cot in the far corner for their youngest brother. This way, if he decided to move around the house at night, they would hear him and get him back to bed before he traveled too far. It wasn't so much that they wanted Guthrie to stay in bed as much as it was that they worried that he might wander outside and into danger. Soon enough, Guthrie got used to the fact that he was supposed to stay in the bedroom, and he never went much further than Brian's bed anymore. Sometimes it bothered Adam to wake up and see that Guthrie always chose to seek comfort from Brian, but he never allowed himself to dwell on this fact.

"Hey Adam," Guthrie asked as his oldest brother tried to get him under the covers of his cot. "When's Brian coming home?"

"Pretty soon," Adam said, though in truth he was sure he'd already heard the truck pull in a few minutes earlier.

"Do you think he can read me a story tonight?"

"Why, you don't want me to read you a story?" Adam asked, feigning offence.

"I want you to sing me a song," Guthrie said, flashing him a cheeky smile. "And _then_ I want Brian to read me a story."

"I think I have a better idea," Adam said, realizing that Guthrie wasn't about to fall asleep anytime soon with thoughts of Halloween racing through his mind. "How 'bout Evan comes up and tells you that story you love about the horses? Then, I'll come sing you a song, and Brian can tuck you in?"

Adam knew his little brother would go for this plan, and he was counting on it too, because he needed to keep both Guthrie and Evan occupied while he dealt with the other two boys. Thankfully, Guthrie was overjoyed with the idea, and before Adam had a chance to stop him, he jumped out of his bed and raced across the room.

"I'll go get Evan myself!" He was out the door in a flash, and Adam was too tired to tell him to come back.

Instead, he strolled over to the window, and glanced outside to make sure that Brian was home. Noticing the truck parked at the end of the walkway, he was partly relieved that they were finally going to get things over with. He still didn't know how he was going to clear things up with Ford, but he had a few ideas in mind that he hoped he could use. Knowing he couldn't stall any longer, Adam crossed the hall and gave a slight rap on Daniel's door. Though the boy hadn't been forced to spend the evening in his room, Daniel always preferred to reflect in solitude.

After a moment's shuffling inside, Daniel pulled the door open, and Adam could tell from the puffiness in his brother's eyes that he had been crying again. He might have felt sorry for him if it weren't for the fact that Daniel had lied to him earlier. Noticing that his brother was still dressed, Adam motioned toward the stairs.

"Come down to the living room with me," he said softly. "I need to talk to you."

Daniel's face fell. "I want to stay up here."

"And I want you in the living room."

"Is everything okay?"

Afraid to tip his brother off too soon, Adam just shrugged. "Come downstairs." He motioned for Daniel to walk ahead of him, and like a lamb to the slaughter, the confused boy slowly made his march down the staircase to the living room below.

Brian raised an eyebrow at Adam as he descended the stairs, but it quickly became apparent to Daniel that he was more confused about the fact that Guthrie was still awake than he was about any of the other boys. For his part, Guthrie had practically climbed on Evan's back to get him upstairs, but Evan, who was in the middle of a card game with Ford, had little desire to leave. When Adam motioned for Evan to come over to his side, Evan gently pushed Guthrie away and met his oldest brother on the landing.

"Listen," Adam said in a whisper, crouching down to Evan's side. "I need to talk to Daniel and Ford for a while, so I was wondering if you could be a big help to me and go upstairs with Guthrie. You don't have to get him to sleep, just sit with him and tell him a story or something."

At this request, Evan was overcome with concern, but not for the reason Adam expected. "Do I still get to stay up with you later?"

With a soft smile, Adam brushed his hand against Evan's cheek. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten."

Evan smiled back. "Okay, I'll tell Guthrie the one about the horses. It's his favourite."

When Evan disappeared up the stairs with their youngest brother, Brian couldn't help but notice the look of fear that passed between Daniel and Ford. In turn, he glanced over to Adam, who seemed to have caught the exchange as well. Adam gave a subtle nod to Brian and motioned for him to take a seat. Quietly, Brian moved across the room and sat down at the piano bench behind the couch, recognizing that while Adam planned to do the talking, he was wanted there for backup just in case.

"Come sit over here on the couch," Adam said to the younger boys, and though he didn't sound particularly angry, there was a firmness to his voice which left no room for argument.

With a second glance to Daniel, Ford moved to the far end of the couch, sinking down between the arm of the sofa and a throw pillow, looking as though the entire thing might swallow him whole. Daniel hung back by the stairs, noticing that the color had drained from his younger brother's face. He was certain his face looked much the same, and realized that both Adam and Brian were staring at him.

"Today, Daniel," Adam said, arms crossed. There was no sign of the concern on his face from earlier, no sense of gentleness, and the only reason Daniel joined Ford on the couch at all was so the little boy wouldn't have to sit alone.

Once Adam was confident that Daniel wasn't going to make a run for it, he took a seat on the coffee table in front of the two boys. Though he hated what he'd done to Daniel earlier in the day, it was hard to feel sorry for the kid as he was glaring at him with a mutinous look. Ford, on the other hand, looked so tiny, and he shook just enough that Adam wished he could reach out and hug the boy. But he knew he couldn't do that yet, not when they still had to get to the bottom of things.

So here it was, finally, the moment Adam had been dreading all day, but as he looked between his two little brothers, he had no idea where to start. He wasn't sure whether to yell or to forget the whole thing and send them up to bed. But he knew he couldn't do that, so he shot a look toward Brian, hoping he might have an idea.

Giving a subtle point in Daniel's direction, Brian mouthed the words, "Ask him."

Adam took in a long breath, but complied.

Ignoring Ford for the moment, he focused his gaze on Daniel. "We had a conversation earlier today, didn't we?"

Refusing to look at Adam now, Daniel stared up at the staircase behind him, while Ford eyed the two brothers, silently wondering what was going on. When Adam tilted his head and caught a look from Ford though, it nearly broke the man's heart to see his little brother's eyes well up with tears. It did, however, convince him that Ford was involved in the prank, and as much as he had hoped that wouldn't be the case, he knew he couldn't let himself deny it any longer.

"Well," Adam said, tapping Daniel's leg. "Didn't we?"

When Daniel remained silent still, it was the only push Brian needed to lean forward in his seat and begin playing his role as backup enforcer. He whispered in Daniel's ear, "When somebody asks you a question, young man, the proper thing to do is answer them."

Daniel twisted away from his brother, irritated by the hot breath on the back of his neck, but he replied through gritted teeth, "Yeah, we had a conversation."

As Brian began shaking his head, indicating that the boy's attitude was unacceptable, Adam shot him a pleading look to let it be for now. He needed to get through this without one of the two of them exploding.

Once he was satisfied that Brian would remain calm, Adam crooked an eyebrow at Daniel and asked, "Care to remind me why we had that conversation?"

Daniel shrugged, his embarrassment at the current situation overshadowing his earlier remorse. "Not really." The flick he received to the ear from Brian a split second later was enough to warn him against saying anything else for the time being. He sat still instead and nursed his ear, refusing to acknowledge anyone.

"I think it was about the fact that you took eggs and threw them at different places in town," Adam said. "Wasn't it?"

Ford let out a small squeak, but no one paid him any attention yet. Instead, Daniel remained the focus of the interrogation.

"Tell me something," Adam went on. "The whole time we were upstairs today, did it ever occur to you to tell me that Ford was in on your prank?"

Daniel was quick to respond this time, as his eyes flicked up at Adam, disgusted by the notion. "I wasn't going to rat on my little brother."

"No?" Adam tried hard to ignore the sound of Ford's sniffle now as he worked his hardest not to snap at Daniel. "Let me get this straight. You think it's okay to drag your little brother along with you to play illegal games with your friends, but you draw the line at tattling on him? Do you have any idea how much trouble we would all be in if people thought we were letting you boys run wild?"

"Who cares?" Daniel asked. "You didn't even know Ford was there until – well, I don't know how you found out."

"I told him," Brian admitted, and the sharp tone of his voice behind them caused both younger boys to jump. "Maybe Adam didn't know you two were in Murphys last night, but I sure did."

"Great," Daniel scoffed, turning back to Brian with a look of contempt. "You must be proud of yourself. You told on a ten-year-old."

"Hold on just a minute," Adam said, and as his voice rose, Ford sunk lower into the couch, cowering next to a rather riled up Daniel. "None of this is Brian's fault. It's a good thing he told me too. The last thing I needed was to hear about this from someone in town."

Brian nodded. "You got Ford in trouble when you brought him along, Dan'l, not me."

"Ford got himself in trouble," Adam corrected, which was followed by a whimper from his little blond brother.

No longer concerned with defending himself, Daniel tried to jump to Ford's rescue instead. "Don't be mad at Ford. I made him come with me. I didn't give him a choice. It was all my fault."

"Was it?" Adam asked, and for the first time, directed a question at Ford. "Did Daniel make you go with him last night?"

With watery eyes and a quivering lip, Ford glanced down at the floor, too scared to answer.

"He didn't want to come," Daniel said, desperate. "I didn't give him any other option."

Sliding forward on the table, Adam placed one hand on Daniel's chest to silence him, while he wrapped the other one around Ford's elbow, giving it a gentle tug. He bent over slightly, craning his neck until Ford had no choice but to look him in the eye.

"Tell me," Adam said, his voice soft, merely a gentle whisper. "Did you throw any of the eggs last night?"

As Ford dipped his head forward in a nod, a tear slid down his cheek, landing in a warm droplet against Adam's forearm.

Not yet ready to comfort the boy, Adam asked, "Did Daniel make you do that?"

Ford squeezed his eyes shut tight, shaking his head back and forth as he replied with a trembling, "N – no, Adam."

"Did Daniel make you lie to Brian about it, or threaten to do something bad to you if you told?"

"No." Another tear fell down Ford's cheek as he pulled his arm free of Adam's hold, burying his face in his hands. "I'm sorry."

"I'll bet you are," Adam said, but little sympathy could be heard in his voice. As he sat up straight again, removing his hand from Daniel's chest, he felt his own heart ache. "But it doesn't change the fact that you went ahead and did something you knew was wrong."

Ford tried to calm himself, knowing that what Adam said was true. Though he wasn't scared of his big brothers, he did worry about what Adam would think of him after this, and he glanced toward Daniel, trying to gauge what sort of trouble his brother caught for his involvement in the prank the night before.

The problem, though, was that Daniel seemed to forget his earlier apologies to Adam, and he sat there angrily, stewing in his own misery. He couldn't understand why Ford was in trouble when he'd only been dragged into this by Daniel and his friends. Ford never would have done something like this otherwise.

Knowing he had to protect his brother, Daniel turned to Adam and asked, "Can we talk alone?" He wanted a chance to speak without Brian getting on his case for being rude, and without the sound of Ford's pitiful whimpers next to him. "Just for a minute?"

"We don't need to," Adam said. "You didn't have any problem letting your brother go along yesterday, and you didn't have any problem keeping it a secret from me this afternoon."

"But Adam-"

"You had your chance to defend yourself earlier."

"Myself?" Daniel kicked at the leg of the coffee table. "I don't care if you're mad at me. You can lick me all over again for all I care. Just don't be mad at Ford. It wasn't his fault. He wouldn't have done anything bad if I wasn't there."

"You're probably right," Adam agreed, "but the fact is that he did do something, and you did nothing to stop him. Maybe that's something you'll want to think about while Ford and I talk upstairs."

Ford began to shake, crying silent tears between his brothers. Even Brian was pained by the way Adam said this, as though Ford was about to be sent to the gallows. He felt a little sorry for the younger boy, but he knew that Adam was putting up a cold front for the sake of teaching Daniel a lesson. He was sure that Adam wasn't even considering Ford's feelings at the moment, and though he couldn't help it, Brian reached around the back of the couch and gave Ford's shoulder a light, but reassuring squeeze. That was right before he had to reach forward to catch hold of Daniel as he jumped up, ready to defend Ford against their oldest brother.

"You can't, Adam, please!" Daniel's voice broke with desperation. "Please, I'll take his punishment for him."

Adam was almost proud of Daniel's willingness to protect their brother, but it had come a little too late.

"I want you to calm down. You're not helping anyone by screaming. In case you forgot, Guthrie is already in bed."

"But you don't understand, Adam. Ford is too little. He can't take the punishment like I can."

That was probably true, but Adam wasn't about to negotiate with Daniel on Ford's behalf. "That's for me to decide."

Daniel kicked at the table again, only to find himself yanked back down to the couch with a tug on his shirt from Brian. Through gritted teeth and tear filled eyes, he asked Adam, "Why won't you let me explain?"

"Because you had all day to tell me." Adam leaned forward, grabbing Daniel by both arms and holding him steady so he wouldn't try to fly at him again. "If you were really worried about keeping Ford out of trouble, you would have come to me sooner. You know I would have listened to you. You didn't trust me enough to tell me though, so I don't know why you expect me to trust you enough to tell the truth now."

In that moment, Daniel sat restrained, glaring at Adam and trying to find some way to tell his brother just how much he disliked this logic. But he felt trapped in the situation, and knew it was hopeless. Adam wasn't going to listen, and he was probably going to punish Ford the same way he'd been punished earlier. Daniel would never admit that Ford had just as much to do with the trouble in town as any of the older boys, because his earlier words were true. Ford had only gotten involved because Daniel was too careless to think about anyone but himself.

Unable to face Ford, Daniel cast him a look from the corner of his eye and whispered, "I'm really sorry."

Ford said nothing in reply, but gave a small nod, as if to acknowledge that he understood Daniel's predicament. If they'd been alone, he would have told Daniel that he didn't blame him for the trouble, and in truth he appreciated the fact that his brother had tried his best to keep his name out of things. As much as he worried about what Adam planned to do to him, he would sooner take the same punishment Daniel received than know he got away with doing something so bad.

The little boy dared look at Adam then, and was startled to see that his older brother was already watching him. Adam reached an arm out and pulled Ford up to stand next to him, before running a hand through the child's pale blond hair.

"I think the two of us should go upstairs and talk for a while," Adam said, and in that moment, Ford thought his brother actually sounded pleasant.

As Adam stood and wrapped an arm around Ford, leading him toward the staircase, he shot Brian a look the younger boys did not see, one that pleaded with Brian to keep Daniel calm. With a slight nod of the head, Brian silently agreed to live up to his end of the deal, and he hooked a finger around the back collar of Daniel's t-shirt, ready to let the other two leave.

It wasn't until they were halfway up the stairs that Daniel realized what was happening. He jumped up to follow them, but Brian caught him by a fistful of his shirt and held him back. Realizing that he now risked catching trouble from Brian too, Daniel twisted around on the couch to face him, his face full of sorrow. "It's not fair."

As much as Brian wanted to sympathize with Daniel, right then he had to remain united with Adam. "I know you think it isn't fair, but you need to remember that Adam will give Ford a chance to properly explain himself."

"That's not what I'm worried about. I don't want Adam to-" he stopped his thought short, but Brian quickly guessed what he wanted to say.

"You don't want Adam to use his belt on Ford?"

Daniel nodded, but instead of the tears that usually befell the boy during emotional times, his face was covered in a vicious glower. "I hate him."

"You do not." Brian might have been angry if he didn't know Daniel better. His brother often spoke without thinking when it came to a matter of justice. Brian did think that it was a good idea, though, to remind the boy that he was getting out of line. "I know you're upset, but Adam isn't doing anything wrong. He has every right to be angry with you for causing trouble with Ford, and he has every right to be angry with Ford for the exact same thing."

"But Ford wouldn't have done it if it weren't for me."

"Don't you think Adam knows that? Heck Dan'l, we all know that. But it doesn't mean you and Ford don't need to learn that you don't do something bad just because everyone else is doing it. Ford could have refused to go with you, and he could have told me what you were doing the second I came to pick you up."

At the sound of Brian's words, Daniel's face twisted into a confused mess, as though he thought his brother was being ridiculous. "Are you crazy or something? Ford wasn't gonna sit alone in town, and he would never tattle on anyone."

"Then he has to learn the consequences of keeping secrets for other people."

Daniel had never felt the urge to punch Brian more than he did in that moment. Despite Brian's role as a parent in the family, he would usually listen to reason more than Adam did, and was more understanding when it came to their troubles. But now that he was flat out declaring that Ford should have been a snitch, Daniel couldn't take it anymore. He knew better than to let his fists fly, that was a lesson he'd learned early on, but he needed to do something with himself. Climbing over the back of the couch, he sat down on the bench that had been occupied by Brian a few minutes earlier, and lifted open the piano lid.

"What do you think you're doing?" Brian asked, though it came out more as a whispered request that he stop rather than a question.

Daniel ignored him, and instead began banging the keys as loud as possible. When that didn't help him feel any better, he switched to minor chords, thinking it might match his mood.

"Stop that!" Brian said, but when he grabbed Daniel's shoulder the boy only pulled away and continued to play. "Guthrie's in bed!"

"So what? I don't care!"

Brian had known there would be some trouble from Daniel, but he never expected the boy to have a temper tantrum like the one he was having right now. Feeling his own anger begin to rise, he reached out to stop Daniel again. When the boy refused to listen, Brian slammed the piano lid closed.

"Hey!" Daniel screamed, sliding back on the bench and pushing his brother away. "You could have broken my fingers!"

Brian didn't like being pushed, and he didn't like being yelled at, but most of all he didn't like being ignored. "Guthrie's in bed, Evan's trying to look after him, and Adam's talking to Ford. It's getting late and I told you to stop."

"And I told you that I don't care."

In one quick motion, Brian grabbed Daniel by the arm, yanked him up off the bench, and leaned down close to his ear. "Now you listen to me, little brother, because I'm only giving you one warning. I want you to calm down and smarten up real fast. I don't care if you've already been licked once today, I'll take you over my knee and do it again if that's what you need."

Daniel opened his mouth to yell, but he saw his brother's raised eyebrow and decided it was in his best interest to listen, at least until he was out of arm's reach. He had to struggle to get out of the tight grip, but once he was free, he flopped back on the couch, covered his face with a pillow, and said, "You can all go to hell."

Daniel didn't hear Brian walk back over to him, but he sure felt it when he grabbed him around the waist, hoisted him off the couch, and flung him over his shoulder. There wasn't much time for the boy to think as his brother marched across the living room and out the front door. He didn't stop until they'd gone all the way across the front lawn, into the area just visible by the porch light next to the fence, and stopped next to the big rock. Daniel was relieved when Brian finally put him down, but only for a moment. That was when Brian perched himself on the rock, flipped Daniel across his lap, and gave him one sharp, memorable smack to the seat of his jeans.

"No!" Daniel begged, but just before he had time to complain, Brian brought him back to his feet again.

The older McFadden brother gave the younger one a moment to register the stinging pain in his backside, which, as Brian hoped, had served to reignite the memory of his earlier punishment. "Did you think I was kidding when I said I would take you over my knee again?"

Daniel shook his head, suddenly contrite and defeated. "You just don't understand."

"Sure I do." Seeing how helpless Daniel looked now, Brian took a slow breath, pulled his brother closer and wrapped an arm around his waist. "I know you might not understand this, but I don't like getting angry with you, and I know Adam doesn't either. Heck, sometimes I get annoyed when he's punishing one of you guys, but I don't get angry because I trust him. I don't yell at him or kick things, and I definitely don't swear at him."

Daniel wiped away an embarrassed tear as he leaned in closer to Brian. "I'm sorry I said that."

"Yeah, I figured you were. Look, Adam won't be any harder on Ford than he needs to be."

"But this will be too much for Ford. He can't handle things. He's not tough like me."

Brian laughed, and playfully brushed a hand through Daniel's mess of dark hair. "I'll remind you how tough you think you are next time you cry during a spanking." He could see that Daniel didn't find this the least bit funny, but he had to find some humor in their conversation. As much as Brian hated to admit it, he was also nervous about what was going on upstairs. The only thing keeping him from going up and rescuing Ford was the fact that he trusted Adam more than anyone in the world. Yeah, he believed Ford deserved to be punished, but whether or not he deserved what Daniel got was another question. There was a big difference between being ten and twelve, and despite Daniel's hard headed and sensitive personality, he had nothing on Ford's calm, somewhat insecure nature.

There was a matter of Daniel's behavior that Brian wasn't thrilled with either. He couldn't fault the boy for trying to protect Ford after what happened, but it didn't change the fact that it happened at all.

"Why'd you do it, Dan'l? Running all over town with your friends is one thing, but chucking eggs at houses? You know better than that."

"It just seemed like fun," Daniel said, tired of the conversation. "I didn't think much of it."

"Why bring Ford along?"

"I wasn't going to. But he asked if he could come with me and I knew you would be suspicious if I told him no."

Brian couldn't help but feel slightly responsible after hearing this, but he knew it wouldn't change the fact that Daniel had been there in the first place. "I guess we all need to learn something from this. Ford needs to learn to do the right thing, even if he's worried about what others think. Maybe you need to learn the same thing, and not to involve family in that kind of stuff. And I need to learn to keep a better eye on you, and maybe not let you so far out of sight."

He felt Daniel starting to shake next to him, and wasn't surprised when he saw that his brother was struggling to keep from crying.

"I'm sorry for lying," Daniel whispered, unable to look his brother in the eye. "I know I shouldn't have done those things when you were in charge. Adam says I can't go to town alone anymore."

"I guess that's fair. Look, I know you were just having fun with your friends, but you have to understand that there are consequences to that. Now it's going to take me some time to trust you. I believed you yesterday when you told me you were going to hang out at the candy store. I won't be able to believe you for a while."

Daniel didn't like knowing that he was completely responsible for this situation, but he didn't know what else to do to make it better. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to make you mad at me."

"We'll be okay," he promised, putting his other arm around the boy and pulling him in. Daniel buried his face in Brian's collar, too tired to say much more. It was chilly outside, but neither wanted to leave the other alone just yet.

"You know I love you, right Dan'l?"

"Yeah. I love you too."

"And you love Ford, don't you?"

"Yes."

"Do you think Adam loves him any less than you?"

"No." Though Daniel didn't admit it, he thought perhaps Adam loved Ford even more than he did.

"You have to trust that Adam won't do anything bad, okay. He'll make sure that Ford is all right."

Daniel gave a tired nod. There was no fight left in him to give.

For his part, Brian was all right to hold the boy close, and at least keep him calm until Adam was through upstairs. He didn't know what was happening with Ford, but he guessed that no matter what, he and Daniel were better off staying outside.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Hey everyone, thanks again for stopping by! I hope you enjoy!

Chapter Eight

Upstairs, Adam faced a predicament of his own. Ford had gone up to his bedroom willingly and without complaint. Once they reached the room, though, he lingered in the doorway, leaning against the frame as if anxious for it's support. His head hung low, chin nearly resting in his own shoulder, his hands shoved in the pockets of his blue jeans, a clear picture of embarrassment and shame. If Adam didn't know better, he would have guessed that Ford was cowering like this to gain sympathy. But he did know better, and in that moment, he realized that no matter what he did to punish the boy that night, it couldn't possibly make Ford feel any worse than he already did about himself.

As he loomed above him a moment, staring at the top of the little blond head and wondering what to do, Adam tried to remember what it was like being ten. Thinking back to twelve, Daniel's age, had been no difficulty for him, after all, that was around the age he began straying further from the farm, and spending more time independently from his family. But the one thing Adam hadn't been through in his life was being the little brother, the one who wanted to fit in with the older boys, without disappointing someone in his family at the same time. He couldn't relate to what must have been going through Ford's head, but he knew he had to try.

Though it had taken a great deal of effort for Adam to restrain himself from comforting Daniel when they first stepped into his bedroom earlier that day, he couldn't help extending that small grace to Ford now. Placing his hand on the back of Ford's head and gently pushing him forward, he realized it was going to take a miracle to get his little brother into the room without force. So, he reached down and took the boy under his arms, lifting him into the air and holding him close, carrying him the rest of the way inside. As he turned back to close the door behind them, Adam felt the moisture of Ford's tears on his neck, and his stomach turned, the awful reminder of his own responsibilities creeping back to him. He held the boy a moment, leaning back against the wall.

"Adam?" came the small squeak of a voice.

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry."

Adam might have smiled at the apology if he wasn't so sick about the conversation they were about to have, and though he wanted nothing more than to stay there forever, holding his brother close and telling him it would be all right, he knew he couldn't do it. Ford had to learn that his actions had consequences. Adam had made a promise to raise these boys properly, and that meant sending them out into the world as decent human beings. So far, he couldn't help but think that he was failing at this job, and he had to do his part to correct it.

It was the sound of someone banging piano keys downstairs that shook the young man from his own mournful thoughts. Though he had a hunch that Daniel was responsible for the noise, he knew Brian would take care of it, and had to resist his own urge not to start screaming down that Guthrie and Evan didn't need to hear every last noise that went on in their house. Whatever was about to transpire there with Adam and Ford, he didn't think he needed any attention on it alerted to the other two boys upstairs.

When the lid of the piano banged shut, and the house went silent again, Adam carried Ford over to the bunk bed, and placed him on the ladder. Ford hung back a moment, confused, clinging to the rungs with nervous hands. When Adam patted the space on the mattress at the top, Ford silently climbed, taking a seat and facing Adam, his legs dangling over the edge. Though this top bunk was technically Evan's bed, Adam had placed Ford there for a reason. He knew that Ford would likely spend the majority of this conversation looking down, and Adam wasn't about to spend it staring at the top of his brother's head. So, this way, when Ford listened with his head hung low, Adam would still be able to look him in the eye.

Still, Ford kept his eyes closed, until finally, Adam ran a hand across the boy's cheek, resting it just behind his ear. He hated how much trouble the day had caused, but as much as he wanted to kiss his brother goodnight and tell him not to do something like this again, he knew he had to make sure he understood what he'd done wrong.

"Look at me," Adam said, and though he tried to sound firm, it was perhaps gentler than a boy in this much trouble deserved.

Ford squeezed his eyes shut tighter, ringing out the last of his silent tears, before looking down at Adam, his lashes damp like grass blades in morning dew. He tried to brush his cheeks dry, before resting his hand on Adam's wrist.

"You're going to spank me now, aren't you?"

"Not now," Adam promised. "We've got a lot of talking to do first."

"What's there to talk about?" he asked, shifting uncomfortably on the bed. "You already know the whole story."

Adam had to hand it to Ford. He wasn't trying to argue or deny his involvement in the egging. He wasn't even asking for a chance to explain himself. But Adam wanted to hear his side of the incident just the same.

"I want you to tell me what happened last night, in your own words." He waited for Ford to speak, but the boy had nothing to say, and instead stared at the collar of Adam's long sleeve t-shirt. "All right, I guess you don't really know where to start, do you?"

Ford gave a small shrug, and if Adam didn't know any better, he would have thought that Ford was trying to avoid the conversation altogether.

"How's this?" Adam asked. "I'll ask you some questions, and you just go ahead and give me an honest answer. Do you think you can manage that?"

Again, Ford just lifted his shoulders a little before shaking his head. "Adam, I feel awful about what happened. I don't really want to talk about it. Can't you just spank me and get it over with? I don't want to think about it anymore."

Well, Adam wasn't really sure what to make of that. Was his little brother, so typically well behaved and thoughtful, really asking to get a tanning over with and be left alone? And was Ford really crazy enough to think that Adam would just up and do that without getting in a decent lecture first? No, the kid had to be mistaken, and though his question hadn't been asked in a disrespectful tone, Adam knew that his little brother was only a few steps away from walking all over him tonight, and he couldn't have that.

Moving both hands to Ford's shoulders, lest the boy try and shrug at him one more time, Adam held him in a firm grip, and gave him one solid jolt, causing the boy to look him clear in the eyes.

"What's gotten into you today, Ford? You normally go out of your way to avoid getting into trouble. Why would you willingly jump to your punishment right away?"

"I just don't feel like talking about the rest of it."

"Well, _I_ feel like talking about it, and seeing as how you're in the wrong here, I think it might be in your best interest to cooperate. Huh?"

Reluctantly, Ford agreed, by way of a long drawn out, "Ohh-kayy."

"All right. So why don't we start at the beginning? Yesterday, you asked to go along with Brian and the others to watch Crane's practice, didn't you?"

Ford nodded.

As much as it pained him to do it, Adam sharply requested that the boy, "Speak up." He didn't want to be so strict, but if this one and only time was enough to get through to the boy, then he could be a little bit mean for just a while. "Did you ask to go to the high school with Brian yesterday?"

The question seemed simple enough, and Ford replied, "Yes."

"How did you end up staying in Murphys with Daniel?"

"We were driving to the school," Ford explained, "and Daniel asked if he could stay in town and meet his friends at the store instead."

Realizing that wasn't even a full explanation, Adam added, "And you asked if you could stay with him."

"Yes."

"Did you know that Daniel had stolen eggs from the kitchen?"

"No."

Although Adam believed this was true, he couldn't help but notice the way Ford squirmed under his grip, unsure of himself and trying to look away.

"Did you know what Daniel and his friends were up to?"

After thinking about it a moment, Ford admitted, "I didn't know, and I wouldn't have gone with them if I did."

"Why not?"

"Because they were bad."

"But you stayed with everyone anyway," Adam said, and though he was relieved that Ford at least knew his actions were wrong, unlike Daniel who tried to argue that they were harmless, he wasn't ready to let it go at that. "I want you to know that I believe it when you tell me you didn't know what the other boys were up to when you first got to town. But now I'm going to ask you some tough questions, and I want you to give me a truthful answer. Do you understand me?"

"Yeah."

Loosening his grip on Ford's shoulders, Adam let his hands slide down to the mattress and rested them gently at his brother's side, thinking it might be a good idea to be less intimidating if he wanted to get the whole truth out of him.

"When you found out what the other guys were up to, did you say anything about it?"

"I – I couldn't."

"Why not?"

"They would have laughed at me and we were already gone from the store and I was mad at Daniel and I didn't want him-"

"Wait. Why were you mad at Daniel?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Ford, in this situation, it does matter. I told you that I expect you to be honest with me, and I wasn't joking."

Taking a deep breath, and looking at Adam as though he couldn't believe he was making him admit this, Ford shyly began to explain himself. "When me and Daniel got out of the truck last night, Daniel told me not to embarrass him in front of his friends. I'm not embarrassing, am I Adam?"

"Of course not." Despite the words, Adam could understand what Daniel's frustration had been. Even growing up, when Brian was his best friend in the world, Adam couldn't sometimes help but think of him as nothing more than a pesky little brother. "Is that why you were mad at him?"

"No. That's just what started it. Once we got inside, he was talking to all of his friends, but he was ignoring me. Then, when they said it was time to go, Daniel came over and told me I didn't have to come if I didn't want to. But his friends didn't care if I was there. Only Daniel did. They invited me to come with them."

Adam nodded, thinking there may have been more than one explanation for Daniel's behavior. "Did it ever occur to you that Daniel was only telling you that you didn't have to go along so that you wouldn't get in trouble?"

"Yeah, but not until after it was all over."

Though he wouldn't admit it to Ford, Adam actually felt a little bit of pride in Daniel right then. Sure, he had done a rotten thing, but he had tried to keep Ford out of it. On top of keeping quiet about Ford's involvement, he later tried to take the blame for not looking out for his brother properly. Maybe he had done a whole bunch of bad things, but at least he was trying to look out for the other boy in his own childish way.

"I've got some more tough questions coming up," Adam said, patting Ford's leg. "Are you ready for them?"

"Sure." From the sigh in his voice, though, Ford didn't sound particularly sure of himself.

"When you were out in Murphys, did you throw any of the eggs, or did you just watch the other boys do it?"

Without hesitation, Ford admitted that he had in fact thrown quite a few eggs.

"Did you ever think twice about doing it?" Adam asked. "Did you ever think that what you were doing was wrong, or that you might be destroying someone else's property?"

"I don't know."

Adam tapped the boy's leg. "What kind of answer is that?"

"I mean – well Adam, I did think about it, but not until we got home last night."

"Did you feel sorry for it?"

"Yes." Ford placed a hand over his stomach. "I felt real sick all night, 'cause I knew that when the sun came up, and everyone saw their houses, they would be upset about it."

"How come you didn't feel bad while you were doing it?" Adam wasn't really frustrated with Ford, but he wished that he could get to the bottom of this entire situation without having to draw the information from him. "How come you didn't take a look at the egg in your hand and tell yourself that it was a bad thing to do before you went and ruined people's stuff?"

"Because I'm not a baby."

"Now what's that got to do with anything?"

"Everybody thinks I'm a baby. I'm way bigger than Guthrie but everyone treats me like I'm little too. Evan and Daniel always play with me when we're at home, but I don't get to be friends with any of the older boys, and they're not so much bigger than me. Daniel lets Evan do everything he does. They never invite me on stuff because they think I'm just a baby. When they took that candy from the store, I didn't even get to be part of it."

Adam raised an eyebrow at the sound of this jealousy. "Did Evan and Daniel happen to tell you how much trouble they got into for stealing that candy? I don't care how big you get, Ford, stealing is wrong at any age, and you know it."

"Yeah but I didn't want to steal. I just wanted to be part of things. Sometimes it's not so fun staying out of trouble all the time."

Adam had to resist the urge to smile. He understood Ford's feelings, he honestly did, but that didn't change the fact that there was a big difference between playing with firecrackers on the front drive and tossing eggs at other people.

"I know you wanted to fit in," Adam said, "but sometimes it comes with some pretty big consequences. You threw eggs at houses and businesses, and you threw them at your school. Did you throw them at Old Pete's truck too?"

"No, Adam. I never!" The tears returned to Ford's eyes, and he looked like he desperately wanted to escape the room right about then. "I didn't want to hurt anybody."

"Here's the thing I want you to understand, little brother, about doing things like you did last night. Even if you didn't throw eggs at his truck, you were there, and you took part in it without telling anyone."

"Well I couldn't tell on the others! They would never talk to me again."

"That may be so, but you made a choice last night. If you aren't going to stand up against people doing bad things, then you have to stand with them when they get in trouble. I know it's hard to walk away when things are bad, and I know you probably felt good being one of the bigger boys for the night, but the reason you had such a sore stomach last night is because you did something you knew was wrong. It might be hard to walk away from trouble, but in the end, you'll never regret not doing a bad thing. You will remember it when you do something wrong, though, and it will eat away at you eventually. I'm willing to bet that if you hadn't been caught last night, you would have come to me when the guilt got too strong, wouldn't you?"

A tear slipped down Ford's cheek, and he nodded.

"From now on, I don't just want you to think about whether or not something is bad because it means breaking a rule. I want you to think about how your actions are going to affect other people, and I want you to think about how you feel inside about yourself. If you do a couple bad things, you can learn from it, and you can move on, but if you keep doing those things, that sour feeling will never go away, and eventually, you won't feel much like talking to anyone. I'll tell you something too, there's nothing I can do to you that will ever make you feel worse than you do about yourself when you act out just to get attention from other people."

For a split second, a flash of happiness came across Ford's face. "Does that mean you're not going to punish me?"

"Oh no," Adam said, shaking his head. "You're going to get punished, same as the rest of those boys. Just because you feel bad inside, doesn't mean you don't have to at least try to make things right for other people."

Ford's face fell. "What are you going to do to me?"

"Well, for starters, you and Daniel both have to pay me back for the eggs he stole."

"But I didn't know he took them."

"That doesn't really matter to me, Ford, and if I were you I would think twice about arguing with me right now. Even if you didn't know they were stolen, you had to have known that it was wrong to waste them like that."

"I only have a few cents in-"

"You're not going to pay me with money. Every day, for the next three weeks, you and Daniel are going to do one extra chore to make up for the stolen eggs. One chore means one egg, and there are twenty-one missing in all. Daniel will have an extra week of his own chores to do to make up for the football practice he has to miss that week, and the only reason I'm letting you out of that is because you didn't originally intend to go along. You're also going to help the other boys from the football team help clean up the town tomorrow, and next week too if you have to." Although it was supposed to be a punishment, Adam couldn't help but think that Ford seemed to like the idea of helping the other kids, and he wondered if it had something to do with wanting to fit in with boys outside the family. He didn't say anything though, deciding that if he could build his character, mend some fences, and make a few new friends along the way, then it wouldn't be so bad.

The contentment on Ford's face soon disappeared, though, when he remembered that there was probably a lot more to this than just the extra chores. When he opened his mouth to ask about it, though, Adam cut him off.

"I already told Daniel this, but the same goes for you. Neither of you two boys are going to be allowed in town, or anywhere off this property, without me, Brian, or maybe Crane along with you."

"But we're not little kids."

"No, but you didn't act responsible enough to be trusted alone, and that's all there is to it." He waited a moment, wondering if Ford would argue, before deciding it was time to continue. So far, Adam had gained the information he expected out of Ford. The boy had been involved in some of the pranking, but not all of it. He'd wanted to fit in, which is what Brian had predicted hours ago, but that didn't make any of this better. And though Adam didn't want to go through with it, he knew there was another part of this punishment that Ford had been dreading since the moment they walked into the room.

But Adam was dreading it more, because Ford had no idea that the belt had been used on Daniel. He really didn't want to use the belt on Ford, but he knew that the boys would probably talk later. If Ford was already concerned about feeling left out and like a "baby", then he would probably feel slighted if he learned that Adam gave him a different punishment.

"I know you wanted to fit in with Daniel and the older boys," Adam said softly, placing his hands around Ford's waist and waiting until the boy looked him in the eye once more. "And I'm sorry if a big part of the reason you acted out last night was because you felt like you're getting excluded. But taking part in trouble means taking responsibility for your actions too."

"I know," Ford said, and surprised Adam when he added, "I knew you would be mad if you found out, but I wanted to do it. Can I tell you something else?"

"What is it?"

"I had fun. Even if I did make a mess."

Adam shook his head, realizing that for the first time, Ford had said something that truly irritated him. "It should never be fun to cause problems for other people."

"I didn't think of it that way," Ford said, and cast his gaze toward his lap. He sniffled, his shoulders slumped in defeat, before he said, "You aren't going to let me go trick or treating tomorrow, are you?"

The question hit Adam like a slap across the face. How had he not thought of this before? It seemed a simple enough solution. In some ways, it would make it easier to keep Ford home on Halloween than it would to give him the same punishment as Daniel. In other ways, it seemed cruel. After all, Halloween was only one day, but there would be weeks of the other boys having their fill of treats and sharing stories about the night that Ford would have to miss out on. Still, Adam thought it might be a good idea to give Ford the option.

Keeping his hold on Ford's waist, he pulled the boy off the bed and placed him on his feet on the floor, and took a seat on the lower bunk of the bed. "I'm going to let you decide what happens."

"Me?" Ford asked. Adam had never let him choose his own punishment before, and he worried that it might be some sort of trap.

"You can stay home tomorrow night, and miss out on Halloween, or you can have the same punishment that Daniel got today."

"But if I stayed home, I would be all alone." Ford wasn't used to being alone on the ranch during the day, but the thought of being there on Halloween night made him shiver.

"Crane would be here with you."

With a wrinkled brow, Ford asked, "Is he in trouble too?"

"No," Adam assured him, letting a smile slip in. "He's just not sure if he wants to come trick or treating anymore, that's all."

"Oh." Though Ford didn't admit it, he had guessed this was coming for a while. He vaguely remembered the days when his mother was the one to take him out trick or treating with Evan, Daniel, and Crane, back when Adam and Brian were too big to go out anymore. Then Crane stopped wearing a costume, and Ford knew he would stop coming out with them too. It made him sad to think about it, because he knew that eventually it meant Crane might move away, and he never wanted that to happen.

"So," Adam said, pulling Ford away from his thoughts, "do you want to stay home?"

He wasn't so sure yet. "Is Daniel staying home too?"

"No."

"Did he get a spanking?"

It was Adam's turn to look away. "Yes."

"Oh," Ford said again, and for a moment he thought he might cry. He hated it when Adam spanked him, but he knew he couldn't let Daniel have one punishment and then take a different one for the same crime. "I guess I'll take what Daniel got."

Adam sighed. He wasn't sure whether to be relieved or not that Ford would still get to enjoy Halloween, but he wasn't looking forward to following through on the punishment. So, he decided in that moment to forget about his earlier thought and offer Ford a second choice. "I want to explain something to you, okay?" He reached out for the boy's arm, pulling him close. "Daniel's been in a lot of trouble lately that has nothing to do with you, and so I used a belt on him."

Ford blanched. "A belt?" Adam had only ever used his hand on him before, and he wasn't sure he could stand the idea of anything else.

"I'll give you the option, though," Adam offered, saddened to have to say it, "of three licks from the belt, or ten from my hand."

Though Ford thought he might burst into tears at any minute, he couldn't help but think that getting only three licks sounded a lot better than anything else. Besides, if Daniel got the belt, then that's what he wanted too, and he was sure the other boys that had been with them the night before got the same thing.

"I guess you better use your belt."

Adam had been hoping Ford would take the hand spanking, since it would be easier for him to give out, but he figured that at least this way he would get things over with faster. He had to hand it to his little brother though for being noble enough to take what Daniel had been given, and thought he would do the boy a favor by keeping out the fact that Daniel had been given five swats instead of three.

"Do you understand why you're in trouble?" Adam asked.

"Because I was bad."

That wasn't exactly the answer Adam had been hoping for, and he wanted Ford to know exactly why he was getting such a harsh punishment. "You shouldn't have taken part in something illegal. Even if you didn't know it was against the law, you knew I would get angry, and if you know that, you know you're doing something wrong. I know it's hard to back out of trouble, but if you don't, you have to be willing to accept the consequences."

Ford only nodded, too embarrassed by his actions to say much else.

"You knew better than to throw eggs, especially at buildings. And you shouldn't have lied to Brian about what you did in town. That was wrong."

"But if I told him what we'd done he would have been mad."

"Exactly. You got yourself in a whole heap of trouble by doing the wrong thing, and then you had to lie about it. It's never easy to tell the truth, but it's not always easier to accept the consequences. That's why you're getting three licks. One because you didn't stick to your values, another because you caused problems for others, and a third because you lied to us." Adam decided not to say anything about having to stay out of trouble in order to keep the people from Social Services off their backs as well. He thought Ford was maybe a bit too young to understand that without it turning to too much worry, and he knew how bad things could be when Ford started to fret in private.

"Are you going to punish me now?" Ford asked, breaking into Adam's thoughts.

"I think we should."

"Are you ashamed of me?"

When Ford asked that, it was all Adam could do not to reach out and hug the little guy. But now wasn't the time, so he shook his head slowly instead. "I'm not proud of what you did, but I'm not ashamed of you. I'm disappointed in your actions, but it doesn't mean I love you any less."

Ford nodded then, and though Adam thought he might say something about being relieved, he glanced at his brother instead and asked, "Did you make Daniel pull his pants down when you licked him?"

 _Ugh_. Adam had really been hoping that Ford wouldn't ask that question. He was already getting away with a lower number of strikes, but to have to admit that Daniel had lowered his trousers for the ordeal sounded worse.

"He kept his underwear on," Adam admitted, "but I'm going to let you keep your jeans up. You aren't-"

"No," Ford said, protesting. "It's not fair if Daniel gets it worse just because he's twelve. I'm not a little kid."

Adam wanted to argue that yes, he was a little kid, but he couldn't find the words, and there was a small part of him that wanted to commend Ford for being so noble in his punishment. At that moment, he wanted to tell Daniel how lucky he was to have a brother like that.

"All right," Adam finally relented, standing up and pointing down to the bed. "This is going to be a bit different from the last time we were up here. I want you to take your jeans down and then lean over the edge of the mattress."

Ford was still a fair bit shorter than Daniel, and Adam could see that the desk he shared with Evan would be too tall for him. He thought the lower bunk would be an easier place to lean.

After a few moments, and Ford's failure to move a muscle, Adam crouched down beside his brother, ready to help guide him through this, when he heard Ford ask him, "Why?"

Confused, Adam felt himself starting to smile. "Why what?"

"Why do I have to bend over the bed?"

There was trepidation in Ford's eyes, and Adam understood right away why he was uncomfortable. The main reason he had Daniel over the desk earlier was because he wanted him to feel isolated. Ford didn't need the same polarizing discipline though, and Adam realized that his younger brother was worried about losing his comforting touch throughout his punishment.

Still, it had to be a punishment, so Adam tried to explain the same way his father had explained it to him many years ago. "I don't want to hit your legs by mistake."

Ford nodded, pretending to understand, and worried that Adam would get mad at him if he admitted how scared he was. But in the amount of time it took Adam to pull the belt from his pants for a second time that day, Ford only managed to succeed in crying, his tears finally spilling down his cheeks in silent, pitiful heaves.

Adam could hardly keep himself together now, but he knew that if he stopped everything to comfort Ford, they would end up in tears five times over before any chastisement was actually given. So, Adam did something that pained him more than it would to punish Ford. He hardened his heart and gave his brother a sharp prod in the arm. "Take your pants down."

Ford tried not to cry as he reached for the button on his jeans, and despite his earlier insistence that he receive the same punishment as Daniel, his hands were clearly shaking. Adam was only able to convince himself that this wouldn't be too much for Ford to handle by admitting that he knew Ford would appreciate getting the same treatment in the long run.

Taking gentle hold of Ford's upper arm, Adam waited for the boy to glance up at him before he spoke. "You're a good boy, Ford, and from now on I want you to remember that before you make tough choices, all right?"

Unable to speak, Ford could only nod, before he felt himself being nudged toward the bed. Adam was about to let him bend over it too, when he made a last minute decision to perch himself on the edge of the mattress first, where he then pulled Ford across the inside of his left leg, allowing his brother the same level of close comfort he always did during these times. As annoyed as he might have been with Ford for taking part in these pranks, he knew he was asking the world of the boy to turn down a chance to play with the older kids just because they were up to no good. If he hadn't been the parent in the situation, he probably would have gone on pretending that he knew nothing about Ford's involvement, because the boy had been dragged into the prank without really knowing what was going on. Adam had a job to do though, and he needed his brother to know that not only had he done wrong, but that there would always be someone to hold him accountable for his actions.

Adam waited a minute, lightly resting his left arm across Ford's back. He had intentionally avoided doing this with Daniel earlier, but Ford didn't need the same lesson. Once Ford's breathing had calmed down some, Adam shifted his leg a little, knowing it would alert his brother to the fact that things were about to begin.

"No matter how much you want to fit in with others," Adam lectured softly, his free hand rubbing circles in the small of his brother's back, while his right hand gripped held the doubled over belt, you have to remember that your duty is to take care of other people, and to be kind to them, and to be good to yourself. Can you remember that?"

"Yes." His voice was so small, so scared, that Adam took another long moment, rubbing his back, and watching as the child's entire body tensed. He was nervous, and Adam understood the anticipation. The white cotton briefs his brother donned didn't look like they'd do much to protect him from the sting of leather, and as Adam brought the belt up into the air, he thought maybe he wouldn't hit too hard, and just let this be a symbolic lesson instead.

He steadied his hand on Ford's back, holding still now, and from the breath he heard Ford take, he knew the boy was ready for things to start. The first blow came down with about the same level of impact it had on Daniel earlier, but when Adam heard the shriek that escaped Ford's lips immediately afterward, he thought maybe it had been too intense for the younger brother. It nearly broke his heart to hear Ford cry out the way he did, but Adam had to remind himself that Ford had never taken things as quietly as some of the other boys. He was still too young to care if anyone heard him cry, and didn't have any of the false bravado his older brothers did.

"I'm sorry!" Ford said, his voice more a whine than a sob, and again, Adam took a moment to let the boy compose himself before he continued.

Adam needed a good thirty seconds to muster up the strength to bring the belt down again anyway, and as he worked to build it, he said, "I want you to remember that it is never all right to go out of your way to make life difficult for others, or to destroy things that do not belong to you."

"I know. I didn't mean to be so terrible."

Adam hadn't been expecting a response, and it came as such a shock that he immediately tightened his arm around Ford's waist, wanting his little brother to know that he was there for him through all of his tears. As he raised the belt, and brought it down again, the cry that followed the whap of leather brought a tear to the young man's eyes. He felt Ford's entire body tense as his feet gave out from under him, causing him to slip down on the carpet. Adam was there though, with his guiding arm around his waist to raise him back up on the bed.

"Adam?" Ford said, his question muffled by the bedspread.

"What is it?" Adam took a moment to lean down next to his brother's ear, worried that Ford was about to confess something else.

"I want you to stop now," Ford whispered, his eyes shut tight so he wouldn't have to look at Adam.

Poor Adam, he wanted to stop more than anything else in the world, but he knew he had to follow through on discipline. As he sat back up straight, he had to remind himself of his father's punishments, and that no matter how difficult this was for him to give, it was nothing compared to what his father would have given the boy if he'd caught him acting out in town.

"You've still got one to go," Adam reminded Ford, and if his voice sounded angry, it was only because he was trying to keep his own sob from raising in his throat.

"But I'm sorry," Ford said, and he twisted a little in Adam's grip, struggling. He was no fight for his grown brother though, and Adam had little trouble holding him still.

"I know you are, but you need to remember that I promised you three licks, and that's what you're going to get. Do I ever break my promises to you?"

His face still buried in the mattress, Ford shook his head.

"Do I tell you lies?"

"I-" Ford turned enough to be heard clearly. "I don't think so."

"No, I don't. I tell you the truth because I'm your brother and I respect you enough to be honest with you. I expect the same out of you, even if you are a little boy. Otherwise, the next time you tell me something, I'm going to have a hard time believing you. Is that what you want? For us to have a hard time trusting each other?"

"No."

"Good. Because I want you to know that you can always come to me, even if you think you're in trouble, and even if you think other people won't like you."

Now, Adam did the best he could to get things over with. He let the belt hang in the air a moment, trying to decide how hard to hit to make it worth it. But he'd just made a promise to follow through, and if he chickened out and gave a lesser punishment, then Ford would feel he'd been slighted.

Perhaps Ford had been more prepared for the last blow, because even though Adam struck him hardest the last time, and even though he made sure to do it on the most sensitive area of his backside, just below the curve of his bottom, the boy was much quieter as the belt struck him a third and final time.

In that moment, Ford tried to tell Adam that he would never do anything bad again, but as he tried to speak, the words came out in a jumbled mess. He didn't even realize that he had also reached back to rub at the sting on his backside until Adam took him by the shoulders and pulled him back to his feet.

"I don't want to do that again," Adam said, his face serious and his voice low, "but I will if you ever disrespect another person's property. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Adam," Ford said, before succumbing to another bout of tears. He hated it when Adam was angry, but it was especially terrible when his brother spoke in a stern, disappointed tone. The anger didn't last long though, and before Ford knew it, Adam had both arms wrapped around him and he pulled him in close. Ford immediately sought comfort in Adam's embrace and buried his face in his chest, too embarrassed to look him in the eye again.

Adam was glad that his brother's face was hidden though, because he didn't think Ford would like to see the tears in his own eyes. He was exhausted, and he hated himself more than anything. The thought that he still had to go downstairs and face Daniel yet again was killing him. He could only guess that Daniel was ready to kill him, and in some ways he couldn't blame him. His hope was that Brian had managed to keep the older boy calm, and maybe talk to him about why it was wrong to keep Ford's involvement a secret.

Too tired to leave just yet, Adam lay back on Ford's bunk, pulling the boy along with him and allowing him to rest on his chest a while. As he leaned back on the pillow, his arms still wrapped around his brother, he tried to speak in slow, soothing whispers, hoping that Ford's tears would eventually die down.

"I know what it's like trying to be good all the time," Adam told him, pausing a moment to kiss the top of his head. "I see how hard you work just to keep out of trouble. And maybe I don't say it enough, but I am proud of you when you try to do the right thing."

"You've never been left out," Ford said through hiccups. "You're always the biggest."

This was true, and Adam knew he would never be able to explain to Ford, at least not until he was much older, how the last four years of his life had been one series of events after another in which he didn't get to take part. There were parties and girls and an entire college diploma that would never be his, and though he knew he wouldn't trade those things in for the life he had, it wasn't always easy accepting that his Saturday night had been spent spanking his little brother instead of being out on the town someplace more exciting than Murphys.

"Being biggest wasn't always fun when I was younger," Adam said, hoping he could show his brother some kind of sympathy. "When I was little, I had to be an example for everyone else, even if I didn't always know what that was. You're lucky."

"Am not."

"Sure you are. You've got five big brothers to look up to, and you get to take all those examples, the good and the bad, and pass them along to Guthrie. And Guthrie's really lucky to have you, because you'll always try to make sure he does the right thing. You'll never let him think it's okay to misbehave."

At that moment, though, Adam couldn't imagine how Guthrie was doing. After the way Ford had screamed, he was sure both Evan and Guthrie were wide awake in the other room and wondering what was going on. He was going to have to go talk to them too, just another thing to add to his ever growing list of people to comfort and calm that night. He wasn't ready to go yet though, and planned to stay with Ford as long as the boy needed it. As they lay there together quietly, Adam began to drift off to sleep. It was only then that he felt Ford begin to shift on the bed, sitting up next to him.

"I'm glad you're my biggest brother," Ford declared, patting Adam's cheek.

"Hmm? Why's that?"

"Because you never stay mad at me forever."

"Who could stay mad at a face like this?" In turn, Adam playfully patted Ford's cheek back and looked up at him with a smile. "You know I love you, right?"

Ford glanced away, trying to hide his own grin as his cheeks flushed pink. "Even when I break the rules?"

"Even then. No matter what."

Adam felt Ford's arms tighten around him then, and he returned the gesture, knowing that over the next few days, he would have to remind his brother more than once that he was still loved and forgiven.

Soon enough, it was Ford who pulled away from Adam's hold, as he announced that he should probably get ready for bed. As much as he liked the comfort of his brother's strong arms, he also liked to have his privacy after this type of ordeal. Adam wasn't entirely sure, but he thought that Ford liked to cry one last time in private, just to get the feelings of guilt out of the way. He didn't really want to leave him alone, but it was getting close to the boy's bedtime, and there were still a few others in the house who needed his attention.

"How 'bout I come check on you in a little bit?" Adam suggested, sliding off the bed, and hiding his belt behind his back. He didn't put it back on until he was out in the hall, where Ford wouldn't have to see it again. Later, he would come back to check on the boy, but for now he was sure he was grateful for a little bit of space, and as Adam headed down the hall to his own room, he couldn't help but wish he had some of his own for a little while.

Deep down, he knew that the licking hadn't really been that bad, and that Ford would recover soon enough. It was the emotional wounds that would take time to heal. Adam had to find a way to forgive himself for being the disciplinarian, because despite Ford's protests that he wasn't a baby, the ten-year-old would require many reassurances that all would be right in his little world again. Maybe Ford had made a few too many mistakes in the last twenty-four hours, but it was Adam's job to make sure his brother's life was safe, and secure, and happy once more.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks again for reading and reviewing! Enjoy!

Chapter Nine

Adam stood alone in the hallway until he saw Ford creep out of his bedroom, dressed in his pajamas and heading off to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Leaving Ford to look after himself, Adam slipped into his own room to face the other two boys. He couldn't help but think that the only thing worse than being a kid walking back into the room after a McFadden _talk_ was to be the adult who instigated said talk. He always felt apprehensive about facing any of the other kids after disciplining one of them. He knew he shouldn't. He was in charge, and he never felt bad for praising them or rewarding them. Discipline seemed to come along with the parenting territory, but as hard as he tried, he couldn't avoid the small twinge of guilt he always felt.

He spotted Evan and Guthrie sitting on Brian's bed. They were laughing quietly together, Evan obviously telling jokes to keep their youngest brother content. Adam stood in the doorway a moment, not wanting to startle them, but Evan noticed him before too long. He looked a little nervous, though not angry, when he realized Adam was there, and gave his brother a shy smile.

"Hey, Adam."

At the sound of Adam's name, Guthrie shifted in the bed, and jumped up to face him. "Hi!"

Adam nodded, and though he was smiling, he asked, "Just what are you doing out of bed, Guthrie McFadden? You should have been asleep over half an hour ago."

"Who can sleep with all the racket around here?" Guthrie shot back, throwing his arms up into the air to show his own annoyance. "I'll go to sleep once the house gets quiet again."

Evan nudged his brother in the ribs, and Adam noticed the look he shot the other boy, as if to tell him it wasn't nice to talk about overhearing another person's punishment.

"It's getting quiet right now," Adam said, approaching the boys and ruffling Guthrie's hair. "Come on, get into your own bed before Brian sees you in his." Adam knew that Guthrie would only end up with Brian anyway, but he wanted his youngest brother to try getting used to sleeping in his own bed.

Guthrie hopped across the room without much argument, his eyes heavy with sleep, but the second Adam had him tucked up again, he was wide awake. "Can Evan stay with me?"

"Not tonight. Evan and I are going to spend some time together."

Guthrie's eyes went round. "Is he in trouble too?"

"No," Adam said. "Not that it's any of your business. Now go to sleep. We have church in the morning, and trick or treating tomorrow night."

Lucky for Adam, Guthrie recognized the exhaustion on his face and curled up under his covers without much fuss, but he did request that Adam leave the bedroom door open for him on his way out. He closed the door halfway, knowing that Guthrie wouldn't get much sleep if he could watch the others coming and going all night.

As Evan joined him in the hall, Adam suggested they go downstairs and start their evening off with a hot chocolate.

"Sure," Evan said, but he tried to hide the excitement on his face. "I think I might go put my pajamas on first."

"Sure," Adam said, with a knowing nod. "I'll go get the cocoa ready."

He knew that Evan was most likely going to check and see that Ford was all right, but he didn't mind it. He guessed that it was probably nice for the younger boys to get a chance to talk to each other and make sure everyone was fine.

Evan found Ford standing at their bedroom window, looking out into the yard.

"What are you doing?" Evan asked him.

Ford gave a small shrug, and turned to face his brother. "I saw a light near the barn and wanted to know who was out there. Looks like Brian is making Daniel do all the nighttime chores with him."

"Better Daniel than me," Evan joked, but he flopped down on Ford's bed and smiled. "You okay?"

"Sure, why wouldn't I be?"

"Come on, Ford." Evan shook his head, surprised his brother would even try and deny this trouble. "Your eyes are still red from crying."

Instinctively, Ford wiped at his face with the back of his hand, but there wasn't much he could do to hide the puffiness. Besides, his cheeks were now bright red too from Evan's comment.

"Did you hear everything?" Ford asked, moving next to Evan and leaning against the bunk ladder.

"Just you crying." Evan flashed him a sympathetic grin. "Don't worry, I cry too. What'd you do anyway? You never get spanked."

Ford hesitated to answer a moment, as though trying to decide whether or not he should let Evan in on the sordid events of the previous evening. Finally, he asked, "Promise you won't get mad at Daniel if I tell you?"

"I guess. What's he got to do with it?"

"We both got in trouble for egging houses in Murphys last night."

"That was you?" Evan wasn't sure whether to be surprised or disgusted. "I heard a couple guys on the team talking about it this morning, but I didn't know you were in on it. I'm surprised Adam didn't kill you."

"He was pretty mad."

Knowing better than to rub it in after a punishment had already been given, Evan patted Ford's arm. "At least it's over now."

"Yeah," Ford agreed, and though he wasn't exactly thrilled with the outcome of the events, he was glad that Evan didn't feel the need to get on his case about it too.

While the boys spoke in their room, Adam was busy downstairs, searching the fridge for the carton of milk that had been shoved behind a large bowl of leftovers and two pickle jars. He hesitated to continue making the hot chocolate when he heard the front door open, and decided he better go check and see that Daniel and Brian were doing okay. They hadn't been downstairs when he arrived in the kitchen, and he knew that if they were outside somewhere, it would be better for Adam to leave them alone until Brian had Daniel calm enough to bring him back in to face people.

"It's cold out there tonight," Brian remarked, as Adam met them in the living room. Adam could tell he was trying to remain in good spirits, but it was Daniel who couldn't make eye contact with him. The oldest brother noticed when Brian gave Daniel's arm a prod, but before Daniel could do anything about it, Brian slipped back outside and left the two of them alone. Adam stood at the foot of the stairs, waiting for Daniel to speak. From the look on Brian's face when he'd left the house, it seemed as though he expected Daniel to say something first, and Adam was going to give him all the time he needed to say it.

It only took Daniel a minute to muster up the courage to apologize to Adam, and once the words were out of his mouth, he found himself in his brother's arms again. This time he didn't cry, but was relieved that things were better between the two of them.

"I know you love Ford," Daniel said, pulling away from him. "I know you wouldn't do anything bad to him. I'm sorry I was so ugly to you earlier today. I didn't mean it, honest."

Adam cupped his hand around Daniel's cheek and gave him a wink. "Yeah, I know. And I don't just love Ford, I love everyone. You too."

Daniel couldn't hide his smile as he offered Adam his own hug, but the moment was short lived.

"I think you'd better head up and get ready for bed. I know Ford is probably waiting to talk to you, and you have a long day ahead of you tomorrow. Church, cleaning, trick or treating."

A smile came over Daniel's face then. "You're still letting me go?"

"I never said I wasn't."

"I know, I was just scared to ask."

"All right," Adam said, "now why don't you get up to bed before I change my mind?"

"Sure thing, Dad." With a laugh, Daniel raced out of the room, narrowly escaping Adam's playful cuff to the ear as he went.

Adam was about to join Brian outside, when the front door flew open and his brother returned. If Adam hadn't known any better, he would have guessed that Brian had been watching through the window for Daniel to go upstairs, but Adam didn't say anything about the spying, especially when Brian asked, "Dan'l gone to bed?"

"Yeah."

"We got the last of the chores finished together. I figured it would distract him for a while"

"I appreciate that."

"So how'd it go?"

"Ford survived, if that's what you're asking."

"Yeah, and I guess you survived too."

"Barely."

"Why don't you go to bed early? You look exhausted, and you know the kids will be crazy tomorrow."

"Thanks," Adam said, "but I won't be able to sleep until you get Crane home. And anyway, I told Evan I would spend some time with him. I was just about to make hot chocolate. You want some?"

"No thanks," Brian said. "I think I'm going to make myself some coffee. Doesn't that sound better to you?"

Between everything with the boys, chores, and just getting by, Adam was starting to wonder how his parents had done it for so many years. He was too tired to ask Brian how things had gone when he went outside with Daniel, and needed to gear himself up for his time with Evan. As much as he would have liked to take a cup of coffee, he thought that it might be a better idea to have the hot chocolate with Evan instead.

He and Brian were both in the kitchen when Evan came downstairs, dressed in his pajamas and looking much happier with himself than anyone else in the house that night. He'd missed seeing Daniel on his way down, but he was too excited to get some alone time with Adam, and maybe even Brian, to think much more about the other two.

"So what do you want to do tonight?" Adam asked, as Evan parked himself at the end of the table and waited for the cocoa to heat. "Board game? We could light a fire."

There was already a glint of mischief in Evan's eyes, as he leaned forward in his chair and tapped his fingers against the table. "I _was_ thinking we could play a game."

Brian caught the look before Adam did, and he laughed. "Just what kind of game?"

"Oh, I don't know. Poker?"

Adam glanced at Evan out of the corner of his eye, contemplating the idea, while Brian asked, "Where'd you learn to play poker?"

"I was hoping you guys could teach me."

The older brothers exchanged glances, trying to decide whether or not it was worth teaching the rascal how to play. Finally, Adam sighed and relented, knowing that it couldn't really cause any harm.

"You can never play it at school," he warned, and with a smile added, "Otherwise you'll be like old Brian here and get yourself into some real trouble."

Evan's eyes flashed with interest. "What'd you do, Brian?"

"Here's an idea," Brian said, picking up his freshly poured coffee and clapping his hand against Adam's back. "Big brother here can tell you all about my trouble, while I go up and take a shower."

"Are you going to teach me how to play?" Evan asked.

"If he does," Brian said, "let me know, and I'll come back and play a couple hands." As he headed through the laundry room, he laughed, and added, "That is, if neither of you mind getting creamed."

Adam poured the hot chocolate into two mugs and carried them over to the table. He placed one in front of an expectant Evan, who wanted to know all about this so-called trouble of Brian's.

"So, when Brian was in ninth grade," Adam explained, taking a seat across from Evan, "he got it in his head that he should start running poker games in the back hallway of the school during lunch period."

"Really?" Evan asked. "We're not supposed to play poker at our school."

"Well, we weren't exactly supposed to play it in the high school either. Since no one had specifically said we couldn't, Brian decided that he would go ahead and run the games anyway. I don't exactly know how it happened, but I guess a teacher came into the hallway one day and saw a bunch of boys sitting around in three circles playing cards. Everyone got hauled down to the office, and the second the principal started threatening expulsion, they all pegged Brian as the ring leader."

"Brian almost got expelled?"

"Yeah," Adam said, though he wasn't sure that expulsion was actually on the line. He didn't let Evan know that it had probably been just a threat though, not wanting his little brother to get ideas into his head about poker matches. "The only reason the principal calmed down about it is because Brian told him that they were only playing for candy. He managed to get off with two weeks detention and a phone call home."

Evan giggled. As much as he hated hearing his other brothers in trouble, it was a delight to hear about the oldest boys' younger days. "I don't remember any of that. Mom and Dad must have been pretty mad at him for it."

"They weren't thrilled about the phone call," Adam admitted, "but Dad figured the detention was punishment enough, on account of him being the one to teach Brian how to play and all."

"Does that mean you'll teach me?" Evan asked. "I swear I won't show any of the other guys. I won't play at school at all, not even for candy."

Adam was hopeful for that, because there was one important part of the story that he'd left out. Though he hadn't taken part in the poker matches, he knew that the boys had been playing for dollar bills and cigarettes, and that the stuff about candy was just a lie to get out of trouble. Adam had kept quiet about it for fear that his folks would have all but killed his brother. As he thought about it again, he could see why Daniel fought so hard to keep Ford out of trouble, and he was pleased that Evan would never know that Adam had done the same thing for Brian a few years ago. All he needed was to teach two brothers one lesson, and then go ahead and let another think the opposite.

"All right," Adam gave in. "We can play a few hands, as long as you understand that it's only for fun at home."

"Great!" Evan exclaimed, jumping up in his seat. "I'll go find a deck of cards!"

While Adam and Evan got started on the rules of the game, and Brian helped himself to the shower, Daniel was tiptoeing down the hall, having just changed into his own pajamas.

The upstairs bedrooms were dark as Daniel made his way down the hall, but he wasn't planning on going to bed just yet. He wanted to, no, _needed_ to see that Ford was all right. Apologizing to Adam had been enough to settle his fears that his older brother was disappointed in him, but now he needed to make sure that Ford forgave him. Not just for getting him into trouble, but for not doing a better job at keeping them from getting caught. He knew it was wrong to lie, and even though he'd been punished, he thought that in a case like this, he still wouldn't tell on one of his brothers for doing something bad.

"You awake?" Daniel whispered from the doorway, stepping into the bedroom and letting the hall light shine on Ford's bed.

"Yeah." Ford struggled to roll over from his stomach, pushing the covers back as he went.

Daniel noticed that his brother seemed to sit up with little difficulty, and he crossed the room to sit next to him, eyeing him cautiously. "Are you hurt?"

Ford gave a shy smile. "No."

"I'm really sorry," Daniel said. "I didn't mean to get you in so much trouble. I shouldn't have let you come with us. I shouldn't have gone with them either."

"It's okay," Ford said, and he leaned a little closer to his brother. "I had fun hanging out with you last night, even if it did get us in so much trouble."

"Well, you can come with me next time, but I promise I won't do anything like that again. Did Adam yell at you a lot, once you were up here?" Daniel was scared to ask exactly what had happened, and instead seemed to think that skirting around the subject would be easier on both of them.

Ford shrugged. "He didn't really yell, no. But he never yells at me."

"You never really do anything bad," Daniel pointed out. "So, he wasn't mad at you?"

"He was a little bit mean at first," Ford admitted. "But it wasn't terrible."

"Is he going to punish you?" Daniel thought that was the best way to ask, without having to say the words.

Ford kind of smiled. "I have to do chores with you."

As bad as he felt about the whole thing, Daniel was glad he would have help on his long list of chores. And if it meant Adam hadn't hit Ford, he was even happier.

Then, Ford crushed that notion by admitting, "He licked me too."

Feeling as though he might start to cry, Daniel took a deep breath and offered the biggest apology he could. Ford was good about accepting it though, and even admitted that Adam had used his belt with a little more happiness than Daniel could have imagined.

"Gosh, Ford, I can't believe he did that. How many times did he hit you?"

"Three," Ford admitted, as though it was the greatest ordeal of his life.

"I'm really sorry." Daniel wasn't going to tell him that Adam had hit him more times. He didn't need Ford feeling bad for him, or for himself for not getting it worse.

"I guess I don't feel too bad," Ford said a moment later. "It hurt, but at least Adam didn't treat me like a baby."

Daniel nodded, and wrapped an arm around his brother, unsure of what else to say. If he'd known that Ford wanted to be treated a little older, he would have done it without dragging him into trouble. It was too late to change it now, but at least he knew for next time.

When the small, poorly played poker game downstairs came to an end, Adam decided it was time to send Evan up to bed while he went into the kitchen to clean up the last few dishes of the day. Evan went up without much fuss, saying a quick goodnight to both oldest brothers on his way up the stairs.

With the milk saucer cleaned and the kitchen table wiped down, Adam was relieved to have a few minutes to relax in the living room while Brian switched over a load of laundry. He took a seat at the side window, at the large desk where their father had always worked. There, he opened up the newspaper, laughing to himself about the fact that he was even reading it now. As a high schooler, he couldn't figure out why his parents insisted on reading it every day, but now that he was in charge of a ranch and family, he wanted to know everything that was going on in his community. It was a good time killer too, and he managed to get all the way through the first two sections of the paper before the side door behind him opened.

When Brian joined Adam by the window, he carried two cups of coffee, and handed one to his brother.

Adam folded up the newspaper and tossed it aside. "He's okay you know."

"Who's okay?"

"Ford. I know you're worried about him."

Brian shook his head. "I never said-"

"You didn't have to. I can see it on your face. I'd be worried too, but it worked out okay."

"What happened?"

"I gave him a choice of getting the same thing as Daniel, or missing out on trick or treating."

Brian grinned. "I can guess which one he chose."

"Yeah, but I didn't have the heart to whip him, so I said he could have it from my hand instead."

Brian was relieved, but only for a moment. "He took the belt, didn't he?"

"Said he wanted what Daniel got. I only gave him three licks, and they weren't the worst in the world. I was kind of proud of him."

"How was he? After, I mean."

"He was Ford. Kind of shy like always, but I think he'll be okay. How was Daniel while I was up there?"

"Angry, but I talked him out of it."

"He didn't give you a hard time?"

"He did, but I handled it. We're quite the team, you and me."

"We sure are," Adam said, and though he wanted to laugh he yawned instead. "I guess I should go up and check on Ford."

"You might want to leave it a while," Brian said. "Daniel was in with him when I got out of the shower, and I bet that's where Evan is now too. Maybe it's better to let the little guys spend some time together."

"Okay," Adam said, a little grateful that he could stay seated just a while longer. "As long as Guthrie doesn't get up though."

"Aw, he's passed out cold. I don't think you have to worry about him tonight."

Though Guthrie was sound asleep, the other three boys were crowded around Ford's lower bunk, examining the damage of the earlier licking.

"I still can't believe he used his belt," Evan said, as Daniel pulled his pajama bottoms back in place. "It doesn't look that bad. Just a little pink."

"Well it was hours ago," Daniel admitted. "It hurt a lot."

"Mine too," Ford said. He'd already shown the damage from his punishment, and though neither of his brothers wanted to say anything, there was barely any sign he'd been struck at all. As much as any of them hated spankings, sometimes they didn't mind coming out of one with temporary battle scars, if for no other reason than to prove their endurance and justify their tears.

Evan just shook his head. "I never thought Ford would get a whipping before me."

"What do you mean?" Ford asked. "You've been spanked before."

"But never whipped," Daniel explained.

Ford asked, "What's the difference?"

"If it's just with a hand," Evan told him, "it's a spanking. But he used his belt, so it's a whipping."

"It's a strange thing to be jealous of," Daniel teased, but he knew Evan wasn't really jealous. He was making it sound worse than it was in order to build up Ford's confidence a little. "Besides, since Adam used his belt this time, maybe it means we will all be too old for any kind of spanking soon."

"I hope so," Ford said, and smiled. "But I'm glad I picked the spanking today."

"You mean you asked for it?" Evan was dumbfounded by the notion of it all.

Ford nodded. "He said I could have a spanking from his hand if I wanted, or one from the belt like Daniel got. A whipping, I guess."

"And you picked the belt?" Daniel couldn't believe it. "What'd you go and do a thing like that for?"

"I – I didn't want you to get a different punishment than me. I did bad stuff too."

"Of all the stup-" Evan started, but caught himself before the word came out. "I guess that was really nice of you."

Daniel just patted Ford's shoulder, grateful to his brother, but still feeling terrible that he had gotten him into this mess in the first place. In turn, Evan smiled and playfully nudged Ford's arm. "I guess we can trust you better than anyone."

Though it was nothing to be proud of, Ford couldn't help but beam at his brother's praise and think that maybe all this trouble was just a little bit worth it.

Later, when Adam did head up to check on the boys, he was surprised to find that both Evan and Ford were passed out in their bedroom, while Daniel was sound asleep in his. He half expected all three boys to be together, especially with Crane out of the house, but he was just relieved to see that everyone was sleeping peacefully. He felt a little guilty as he returned downstairs, because he was too tired to talk anymore. He didn't think it was fair for Brian to have to sit alone and wait up for Crane to call though, so they played a game of cards together instead.

As it turned out, Brian was happy to carry most of their conversation anyway. After running the ranch together for four years, Adam was sometimes amazed that they still found things to discuss, but that was partially Brian's doing. He went out more, had more dates, more nights on the town. He always had stories to tell. Adam often wondered what a normal life was like for someone his age. His friends were fresh out of college and starting careers. A couple were even married already. He often wondered, did they go to parties on Saturday nights? Did they make plans for breakfast or impromptu trips to the movies just to kill boredom? Were they all starting out in new, exciting careers? He didn't know.

What he did know, was that the ones who were still in Murphys were working on their family farms, and probably had similar lives to his. Long days in the sun with a weekend night at the local watering hole if they were lucky. Their early mornings were filled with chores, and they were often tired. None of them though, even the ones from big families, had the responsibility of caring for six siblings weighing on their shoulders. Brian was the only other person who knew that weight, but sometimes Adam wondered if it worried him as much.

But it must have, because Brian's voice suddenly cut into his thoughts. "We'll be all right."

"Huh?"

"With the boys. We dodged a bullet today when Charlie decided not to call the cops, but we'll be okay. Not every day will be this exhausting."

"Hope not," Adam said, but he wasn't so sure.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Hi everyone! As always, just a quick thank you for reading and reviewing! Enjoy!

Chapter Ten

When Brian had dropped Crane off earlier in the evening, he told his brother that he could stay out as late as twelve-thirty. He expected a phone call by midnight, though, knowing that if the teen called by then, it would give him half an hour to get to the party. This way, Brian figured, Crane would know when to expect his ride, instead of having Brian show up at a random time and have to go in to get him from the house. At twenty minutes after midnight, when they'd yet to get a phone call, Brian told Adam that he was going to head out anyway. He left his brother at the front window to grab his coat and keys, and just as he was about to head out the door, the phone call came.

Adam picked up after one ring, and though he was slightly irritated with his brother for calling almost half an hour late, he couldn't fault the kid for losing track of time at his first party. "Don't worry," Adam told him, his voice quiet in the late night. "Brian's already on his way."

With a nod goodbye, Brian slipped outside into the cold darkness. He didn't want to keep Crane waiting long, and besides, it had been a long night and he was more than ready for bed. He knew that with the earlier events of the evening, none of them would have a peaceful sleep, and with Halloween the next day, the boys were sure to be bouncing off the walls by morning.

He didn't have much trouble finding the party house. On a dead end street, it was the one with twenty or so cars parked out front, and the only one in the area with the lights on still. He could hear the sound of music blaring from inside, but he didn't recognize the song. Brian didn't follow music much anyway, and if it wasn't country, he didn't really have time for it. Whatever was playing now sounded more like rock and roll, and he wasn't into it. There were a few kids hanging out on the front porch, smoking cigarettes and sharing cups of beer, and while they were only a few years younger than he was, he couldn't help but think that they looked like kindergarteners playing at grownup games.

He pulled the car up across the street from the house, knowing that it would embarrass Crane to have him pick him up at the door like he was a little kid. Earlier, when he dropped Crane off at Jeff's place, his brother made it clear that he didn't want to be seen with him at any point that night. While Brian still felt pretty young, for the first time he experienced the pain of parental lameness. He couldn't help but wonder if he would have been seen as the cool older brother if he weren't Crane's guardian instead, the guy they would ask to get them beer or pick them up so their parents wouldn't know they had been drinking. But now he was lumped in with the forty-something worriers, who were no doubt just as concerned as he was now about the state of their teenaged sons and daughters.

After listening to three songs and a full run of commercials on the static crackling radio station, Brian was starting to wonder if he cared how uncool his brother thought he was. He was tired of waiting for Crane to come outside. In fact, he was just plain tired of being awake, and wanted to get to bed. He thought about honking the horn, thinking in might alert the kids inside that someone's ride was there, but he doubted they would hear him over the sound of their music and shouted conversations. This late in the evening, the only kids who were still hanging around were either too drunk or too exhausted to understand their surroundings properly.

Finally, after another song and a half, Crane appeared at the front door, and he caught sight of the truck right away. Brian couldn't help but notice the slow way his brother walked, struggling to make his way down the steps. He might have laughed at him, but that was before he noticed Crane's shirt, or rather, Adam's shirt, which was now unbuttoned and falling slightly off his shoulders. His white t-shirt still seemed to be in place, but despite their earlier conversation, and Brian's insistence that Crane take the condom with him, he suddenly began to worry that his brother had taken his words as encouragement to do something he wasn't prepared to do. He tried to push the feelings of worry aside though, and as Crane made his way closer to the truck, Brian reached over and pushed the door open for him.

"Hi," Crane said, trying to hide a goofy grin as he climbed up into the truck and slammed the door behind him.

"Hi yourself," Brian said, surprised at how much he enjoyed the way his brother was trying to hide his drunken state. "How was the party?"

"S'good."

As Brian put the truck in gear and started to move forward, he tried to keep the conversation casual. "So, was Cathy there?"

A moment of silence from Crane. When Brian looked over a minute later, he realized that his brother was nodding, and there was a sly smile on his face. He couldn't quite figure out why though, and it made him nervous.

"What happened?"

"I don't know."

Brian glanced over again, and this time noticed that his brother's eyes were fixated on the road ahead of him.

"Are you mad or something?" Crane asked suddenly.

"No, why?"

"You're driving really fast."

Brian did laugh this time. He was driving no faster than normal, in fact he was going a bit slow because it was dark on the back roads. But the look on Crane's face as he started to grip the door handles was a dead giveaway as to why the teen thought they were moving fast.

"You feeling all right?" Brian asked, knowing the answer already.

"I'm fine," Crane said, but took a deep breath a moment later. "Maybe you should slow down."

"Or pull over," Brian suggested, and it was a good thing that he decided to do so too. As he pulled the truck to a stop in the middle of the road, Crane yanked back the handle, and spilled his guts onto the pavement before he even managed to step outside. Brian felt sorry for the kid. He knew how it felt to be that drunk, and while he wasn't exactly thrilled that his brother was puking his brains out on a back country road, he couldn't say that he was disappointed either. He'd wanted Crane to have a good time, and it looked like he had done that.

Slowly, Crane stepped out of the truck, until eventually he was leaning against the side, trying to regain his composure before he faced Brian. After a few minutes of adjusting his clothes and trying to wipe his face clean, he climbed back into the truck, and dared to peek over at Brian.

"I'm sorry."

Brian only shook his head as Crane closed the door once more, quiet now. "I take it you had a good time."

Crane crossed his arms over his chest, suddenly feeling the cold and wondering why he hadn't thought to bring a jacket. Hugging his arms around himself, he managed to stumble out a second apology. "I'm really sorry, Brian."

"It's okay."

"No, not about the party. I mean, I didn't mean to drink, but I'm sorry for what I said earlier. I didn't mean to say that you sleep around or anything like that. I know you're not that kind of guy."

Truthfully, Brian hadn't thought much about it since their conversation, and he hated to think that Crane's drinking maybe had something to do with his guilt. "Look at me, Crane." He placed a hand on his brother's arm. "You didn't hurt my feelings or anything. I'm an adult, I can handle whatever you want to say to me."

Crane nodded, but when the tears started to fall down his cheeks, Brian only shook his head.

"How much did you have to drink?"

"I don't know. Not as much as some people."

"Oh man, you're a mess."

Crane's eyes flashed up at him then. "You think Adam will be mad at me?"

"Nah. Anyway, we don't have to tell him anything. He's so tired he'll probably be in bed anyway."

Crane nodded, still lightheaded and clearly in no shape to do much but pass out. Still, he reached his hand into his pocket, and pulled the unused condom out. "Here," he said, tossing it in Brian's lap. "Take it back, okay? I'm not going to use it."

Brian felt his stomach turn, but he tucked the package into his coat pocket as he wondered if that conversation had come up at some point in the night. "You sure you don't want it, just in case?"

"No, not now anyway. I'm not ready for that."

Though he didn't know how to say it, Brian wanted his brother to know that he was proud of him for making that decision. "There's no rush, you know."

"I know. Besides, the kiss was enough for now."

It took Brian a few minutes of driving down the road again before he realized what Crane had said, but this time he didn't bother to respond. Instead he reached over and ruffled his brother's hair, glad that despite Crane's fears, he at least had a bit of fun.

The remainder of the ride home was mostly silent, with Crane nodding in and out of sleep, while Brian tried to get down the road as fast as possible. By the time they reached the ranch he had to wake Crane, and then reassure him that he wasn't in trouble when he realized Adam was sitting on the porch waiting for them.

"Just act normal," Brian assured him as they went through the front gate. It was a bit of fun for Brian though, because there was no way Crane could hide his intoxication from Adam.

The second they were up the front steps, Crane made a b-line for the door, hoping to avoid any conversation. No such luck.

"How was the party?" an exhausted Adam asked.

"All right," Crane said, his hand on the doorknob and his eyes on the porch floor.

"Did you have fun?"

"I guess so, yes."

"He's pretty tired," Brian said, shooting a knowing glance in Adam's direction.

Adam nodded. "I guess you better get up to bed then. See you tomorrow?"

Crane nodded, then dared glance at his oldest brother for a moment. "I think maybe I will go trick or treating with you guys after all. If that's okay."

Adam had to hide a smile. "Of course."

Without another word, Crane made his way inside, and Brian moved across the porch to join Adam on the bench outside the front window.

As Adam handed Brian a hidden can of beer, he asked with a grin, "How much did he have to drink tonight?"

"Not as much as either of us the first time we went out."

Adam sat quietly, listening to the sound of Brian cracking open his beer can and remembering the first time he went to a party. He had been sixteen, and because his parents knew where he was going they had allowed him to take the car. Brian had been grounded at the time, what for Adam couldn't remember anymore, but he did remember being slightly excited to have a night without any family around. He'd gotten all but wrecked that night, and he knew he was in no condition to drive home. So instead he stayed the night in his car, and woke with such a headache he thought he might be dying. By the time he finally found the courage to make his way home, he was terrified of what his parents might say.

As it turned out, his mother was the one who met him on the front path. She wasn't upset with him for drinking, she'd anticipated that, but she at least expected him to call when he knew he was in no condition to drive. She told him they weren't going to punish him, because she wanted him to know that there was nothing they could do to him that would ever make him understand how much they loved him, and how much they worried about him. That had hurt more than anything, Adam recalled, the fact that his mother was too disappointed to even yell at him.

"It feels like forever ago," Adam said, breaking the silence as he glanced at Brian. "It wasn't even six years ago, and yet it was like a different time."

"I know," Brian agreed. "Sometimes I can't figure out if a lot of time has passed since they died, or if it's just that a ton of stuff has happened since then."

"Maybe it's both. I never figured that we would be the ones worrying about the guys getting home safely from the party. I always thought we would be the ones they called when they needed a ride."

"I never figured we would be the ones dealing with half the stuff we did today. I knew we would come home to babysit and maybe put up with an argument or two, but I didn't think we'd be doing it all."

"I know you had a hard time today, Adam, but Mom and Dad would be proud of you for the way you handled things."

"You think so?" Adam asked, leaning forward on the bench and burying his face in his hands a moment. "If they were still alive I'm sure the kids wouldn't have pulled any of this."

"Sure they would. Don't forget, big brother, we weren't exactly angels when we were their age."

Tapping his beer can against Brian's, Adam laughed and said, "Ain't that the truth."


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed this story. I hope you've all enjoyed it!

Chapter Eleven

The house was dead quiet when they went up to bed a while later, but Adam liked it that way. There were other nights that he'd been forced to stay up late just trying to get the kids to calm down. Sometimes it was because they were fighting, others because they were too hyper. Tonight though, he looked forward to falling into his bed and passing out. It didn't happen that way.

The moment his head hit the pillow he began to feel the worry creep up on him again. He could hear Daniel and Crane whispering in their room down the hall, and knew at least Daniel would be okay. He would always be okay, as long as he had Crane there to comfort him at the end of the day. Crane was already in the eleventh grade though, and they were less than two years now from the day he went off to college. Adam didn't like thinking about numbers, didn't like thinking about the fact that when Crane went to school, it would mean their parents would have been dead for six and a half years. And by the time Crane got back from college, they would have been dead almost ten. And in that time, Adam wouldn't have much to show for himself, not unless the ranch became very, very successful. But he didn't see that happening any time soon.

He wasn't sure how it happened, but somehow, since their conversation at the sink earlier that day, Crane had become a new worry for Adam. His brother seemed caught in some strange adolescent world, where he was terrified to grow up and yet desperate to do so whilst skipping all the fun stuff in between. It had been a relief for Adam when Crane decided to go to the party, and though he didn't mind the drinking, he was nervous too. What would happen when Crane went off to college and got a taste of life without family around? He had a great head on his shoulders, but with no one to answer to, and no one to set an example for, would Crane run wild and forget himself the way Daniel had this weekend?

It almost pained him to do so, but Adam resolved to keep a close eye on Crane, to make sure that his values were strong by the time he was done high school so that no one would have to worry about him while he was away from home. Adam knew he was only kidding himself. He would worry anyway. It was already hard just thinking about the day Crane left them. Worse than that though, was the fear that he might not want to come back again once he saw a bit of the world outside Carbon County.

When Adam heard the familiar sound of Guthrie stir in his sleep and then tiptoe across the floor to Brian's bedside, he thought again about why the youngest brother always went to Brian for comfort. It probably had something to do with the fact that when their parents first passed away, Brian was the one to take over a lot of the mothering. Adam had jumped into his father's role, seeing to the farm, going through all the paperwork for the boys, the interviews with social services. Brian had disappeared into the background, quieter, but no less important. He was the one who made lunches, spent his summer before senior year changing diapers and drying tears. He'd stepped in when Adam thought the world was going to cave, and he never asked for any recognition in return.

There was no surprise then when a few minutes later, the door to their room pushed open, and Evan appeared at the edge of Brian's bed. At eleven, it was rare for Evan to leave his room in the middle of the night anymore, but sometimes, when he was particularly distraught, he would go to Brian. Always Brian, because he was the one who shared a room with him when he was smaller, and who could comfort him without words. All he had to do was wrap a strong arm around Evan's shoulder and the kid would fall fast asleep.

During times like this Adam couldn't help but acknowledge his own loneliness. In such a large family he rarely had any time to himself, yet he often felt the forgotten one. It was his job to make sure everyone else was looked after, and comforted when needed, but it seemed that no one ever thought to ask if he was okay. Brian did sometimes, but it wasn't the same, because Brian wasn't going to wrap an arm around him the way his mother had or kiss his forehead and tell him everything would be all right. Sometimes, he thought, being a grown up could be pretty isolating.

He thought he might spend the rest of the night fighting sleep, and he was no closer to passing out than he had been when he first lay down, when Adam felt a small hand shake his shoulder. His eyes flashed open, but in the darkness of the night he noticed Ford standing next to him.

Suddenly nervous, Adam propped himself up on one shoulder and asked in a whisper, "What's wrong, buddy?"

"I can't sleep. Can I stay with you?"

"Of course." Adam hoped Ford wouldn't hear the way his voice tightened as he pulled back the covers and let him crawl into the bed. As the small body curled up next to him, he had a sudden feeling of being wanted, the way Brian must have felt every time one of the boys ran to him for comfort.

"You're a good brother, Adam." Ford's tired compliment was so quiet that Adam wasn't quite sure he heard it, but despite himself, he pulled the boy closer and offered him a quiet thank you.

Maybe his life was different, and maybe this wasn't the way most people his age spent Saturday night, but as far as Adam was concerned, he wouldn't have it any other way.


End file.
